Snape's Best Memory
by saridot
Summary: Snape's mysterious pensieve memory wasn't a bad memory at all, but the beginning of another story. Young Severus & Sirius SBSS. Rated for future scenes.
1. Innocent beginings

Hi! This is my very first story on FF.net, so please go easy on me. I've never been a writer really. I'm an artist. I'm also drawing a few scenes from this for yall to enjoy. ^_^ the scene where the marauders harass severus is obviously not mine, I'm just trying to make it all fit in. check back soon to see some snape sketches!

•

It had all begun innocently enough. Morning came to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and a fifteen year-old boy named Sirius Black gradually fluttered his eyes open to see the sunlight breaking through the many windows in the Gryffindor dormitories. A thin t-shirt was twisted and knotted around his slender frame, the result of tossing and turning all during the night. Glossy, dark brown hair flopped back onto the massive pillow at the head of the bed. As he lay splayed out under red and gold sheets, gradually becoming conscious, the last traces of a dream left him. A dream of trying to save someone trapped in a dark cloud. They had been calling out…a thin figure with dark, intense eyes… 

Severus Snape had awoken as well on the far side of the Hogwarts grounds, thought he didn't have the luxury of lounging about, half-awake. The moment his Enervator woke him at five a.m., he leaped out of bed out into the cold air and briskly grabbed his bag of bath items, a towel and a change of robes from inside his nightstand. Creeping quietly past the other four-poster beds that were still emanating snorts and grumbles, careful to not make the floor creak, he made his way towards the Slytherin commons room. 

Once he had escaped out past the portrait hole, he was able to straighten up and walk hurriedly down the hall towards the washroom. The thin sandals he wore made almost no sound save a slight swooshing on the rough limestone floor. When he reached the washroom door he quickly glanced up and down the hall, and then warily cracked the door and looked inside. 

Seeing the lack of the usual gaggle of chattering, splashing boys in the showers, he thought, _oh good. Empty. _

He walked in and chose the closest shower to the entrance. The room was white with green accents, and the showers lining the walls each had thick, tapestry style curtains hanging that had been enchanted with the Impervius charm to make them water-proof. Making sure that the curtain completely obstructed his shower from view, Snape systematically began to undress his scrawny body. He had to be quiet still, just in case someone came in. He twisted the chrome hot water knob, and the shower choked to life. Taking one last peak outside the curtain, he pulled it back and stepped into the scalding stream. 

This is how Severus's life had been for the last four years. In his first year, he quickly found that something about his personality particularly annoyed people, sometimes to the point of violence. After learning the hard way once or twice while going to shower, he fell into the habit of showering before anyone else had woken up. 

Since even the members of his own house hated him with the same passion as everyone else, he could not afford to let anyone catch him. If one person saw him, no matter how their feelings towards him, it could almost certainly be made known to someone interested in making the routine more…difficult. It wasn't that he hadn't fought back in the past; it was just easier to deal with the lack of sleep than it was to hide bruises from concerned professors who were trying to be helpful. 

Often enough, there were people who got to the showers before he did. Those were the days when he would simply have to do without showering; the alternative would be too risky. Sometimes he would have to go days at a time without being able to wash his long black hair, giving it time to become limp and make his face shiny with grease. He hated the slick, gritty feeling that built up at his hairline and in the creases on the sides of his hooked nose. When he finally did get the chance to shower, he would scrub his face raw, trying to clean every pore. 

This was a lucky day. Severus finished his routine with no interruptions and dried off in silence. He put on the fresh robes and reveled in the way the newly washed fabric felt against his own squeaky-clean skin, and then headed quietly back to his dormitory. 

•

"GET UP!" Through the darkness, Sirius suddenly felt the wind get knocked out of him as something soft whacked him across the midsection. 

"Oof! Mpph…go away," he mumbled before turning his back to his attackers. 

Sirius's best friend, a slim boy with short black hair and glasses, climbed onto the end of Sirius's bed and stood frowning. "Hit 'im again Peter," Peter Pettigrew looked up at the boy hesitantly, then shrugged and drew back the pillow again. 

Sirius flipped back over. "No! Wait! Ok, I'm up, I'm up." He threw off the covers and swung his legs over the side of the bed. "Sheesh, James," he huffed, rubbing his eyes. 

"Hurry up and get dressed. I'm starving. Remus already went down." James Potter said impatiently, then jumped off the bed and marched out of the room. Peter followed, looking back at Sirius meekly. 

•

The boys reached the great hall to find that Remus Lupin was indeed already there and eating, but had saved seats for them amongst the crowd of other students. "Good morning" he sang and grinned, then stuffed a whole pancake into his mouth.

"Is it?" Sirius said and sat down with a groan, his hair falling into his face. "I honestly don't know how you do it. I didn't get enough sleep even though I slept a whole 'nother hour than you did."

"Practice, Sirius my boy, lots of practice," said Lupin before starting on the next pancake, still grinning. Smiling made his angular features more prominent under a mop of wavy light brown hair, and his eyes twinkled. "So what's the story? Ready for O.W.L.s: day one, then?"

Sirius sighed. "I think so...I don't know. I stayed up till one o'clock last night studying for the Dark Arts exam. I think I'm ready. I can't wait to get started."

"What d'ya mean you can't wait? Are you crazy, or just trying to follow Remus's bookworm act?" James questioned as he leaned over Sirius to spear a sausage.

Sirius suddenly looked flustered. "I...just mean that I can't wait to get it over with" he quickly replied. "I've been so worried about this." _Because I HAVE to do well on it._

"Well, I'm not worried at all," James gloated. "I found a way to do well on the essay without studying nearly as much as you lot. In fact, not only will I ace the O.W.L.s, I will have barely cracked a book."

Remus sipped his tea and looked skeptically at James. "Jim, you could just study. The rest of us do, and it generally works. You're not going to write hints on your arm again are you? Remember that jinxed ink?" Sirius snorted at the memory of James's arm suddenly screaming out the answers in the midst of an exam the previous year.

"Well, _I_ studied for once, and I'm pretty confident in how I'm going to do on it," said Sirius, reassuring himself as much as Remus.

James rolled his eyes. "Hah! Yeah, awful. If you're so confident, why don't you go talk to Lily? She's had her eye on you all morning." James nodded his head down to the end of the Gryffindor table, and when Sirius turned, the redheaded Lily Evans was indeed smiling right at him.

Sirius had never been very interested in girls at all, not that he would ever let any of his friends know that. He didn't want them to get the wrong idea about him. He thought that maybe he just wasn't attracted to anyone at Hogwarts. But lately, he was feeling quite the opposite, though he would never admit _that_, not even to himself.

"Yeah, I see her," he said quietly around a mouthful of sausage.

James frowned. "So go talk to her you great git! She would obviously be open to the idea. Too bad she wouldn't be open to it with me. Go on while she's interested!" he said as he shoved Sirius's shoulder.

"Jeez, ok, alright. You don't have to guilt me." Sirius stood and straightened his robes and put on his most charming smile. "How do I look?" he asked Remus.

"Simply _smashing_," Remus drawled and rolled his eyes. "Go for it."

_I guess I'll just get it over with,_ he thought. With that, Sirius picked up his plate heaped with food and set off. 

Severus was sitting by himself at the far end of the Slytherin table tossing grapes into his mouth. _I don't even know why I bother to shower. No one ever gets close enough to see that I'm clean, _he thought bitterly as he swallowed. Three years ago, that thought may have brought tears to his eyes, but now all he could feel about it was spite. _What is it about me? I'm not the most outgoing sort, but I'm not that bad._ He threw another grape onto his tongue. _Sure you're not,_ he silently retorted.

_And the fact that you're ugly_… he threw in another grape.

_…and stupid…_ another grape.

_…and clumsy…_ another grape.

_…and all around awful has nothing to do with it, I'm sure._

"Oy! Lily!" he heard somewhere close behind him as he threw the last grape. It missed his mouth completely and landed behind him in the aisle. He instantly turned to pick it up, and as he twisted his head around, he saw Sirius Black step squarely on the little fruit. 

The next moments moved in slow motion. He saw Black's face go from a mischievous grin to a shocked, open mouth gape as his feet slipped out from under him. The plate of food he was holding was thrown high above him, each item separating in mid-air. For a millisecond, he was suspended completely off the ground, as if he was levitating on his back. Then, as if the air could no longer hold him, time snapped and the boy fell flat on his back and was then splattered with an assortment of falling breakfast foods.

Groaning and reaching up to peel a sticky pancake off his face, he turned and found himself looking directly into Snape's black eyes. Abruptly, his feelings of shock melted away to a deep burning rage. _It was_ _Snivilus_, he silently mouthed. 

Everyone had turned to see what the noise was as Sirius slowly got to his feet. Laughter and applause started as he held out his arms and forced a grin at the crowd. James's hooting and hollering could be heard along with Remus's behind him. He turned momentarily towards Severus who was looking up at him, appearing to be stifling a smirk. Seeing the look on Sirius's face stopped him. 

Through clenched teeth, in a voice only the other boy could hear, Sirius whispered, "I'll get you for this, _Snivilus_," and calmly walked back the way he had come.

•

After letting Sirius go wash off the syrup and change his robes, the boys were on their way to beginning the first exam. The subject was Defense Against the Dark Arts, and Sirius did feel he was prepared for it. He was actually fascinated with the subject, and fantasized about maybe someday being an Auror. There was just something so enticing about the idea of defeating Dark wizards for a living; he couldn't get it out of his mind.

"Well," he said facing James, "Lily sure won't ever talk to me again." _I hope. That fall was a blessing. _"Why don't you have a go at it sometime, Jim?"

James was surprised for a moment, and then looked thoughtful. "Alright."

"See you," Sirius told his friends as they parted to be alphabetized. The Great Hall had been cleared of the morning meal, and instead of the usual long tables, the room was full of one-person desks. Professor McGonagall, in her tall crooked hat, was standing in one of the archways organizing the students.

"Students whose first names start with the letters 'J' through 'S', please come forward now for the Defense Against the Dark Arts exam please."

Sirius gingerly stepped forward and was directed to a desk in the third row. He sat down and began to twiddle his quill, going over key points of the subject in his head. _I don't know why I'm worried about this,_ he thought_. I've got it down._

Also being an "S", Severus stepped forward at the call and was directed to the second row. He saw with great dismay that his seat was directly to the front right of Sirius Black's_. Great. Just don't let him notice me._ He quietly walked to the desk, his robes whirling about him as he turned and sat. Even though he was relatively warm, his hands were freezing and clammy. 

Professor Flitwick finished helping the remaining students to their desks, and then climbed onto a short stool at the head of the room. He pulled his wand out with a stubby arm, and with a wave, a piece of parchment appeared at every desk with a short "pop!" He cleared his throat shrilly, smiled, and stated, "You have thirty minutes. You may begin."

Severus began to look over the questions, and to his delight, he realized that he could write volumes on several of them. He wrote quickly and feverishly, filling every gap that he could, covering every aspect of the answers. He had always had small, cramped writing; he often resentfully thought about how it reflected his personality. But now he was writing even smaller than usual. He was so focused that he didn't even notice that as he scrawled his face got closer and closer to the parchment.

Sooner than Snape had hoped, Flitwick squeaked again. "Quills down, please! Stay seated while I retrieve your parchment! _Accio!_

The parchment that Severus had been gripping flew out of his hands along with hundreds of others towards the professor, and he leaned back and sighed. He picked up the question parchment that was left on his desk. Recovering his satchel from the floor, he stood and turned to leave while everyone else was preoccupied with the flying parchment. Pushing through the crowd, he began to go over the questions again, this time armed with his Dark Arts textbook. _Ha! I knew that one! _he thought, flipping through the pages. He made his way down the hall towards the front doors, still studying the parchment, thinking that he would go over the rest of the paper sitting outside on the lawn.

Upon reaching the outdoors, in an uncharacteristic gesture, he stretched his arms out wide to the fall sun and sighed. There was a cool breeze that blew the sheets of raven hair off of his face, and he purposefully strode towards some shady shrubs. _Perfect,_ he thought as he seated himself, crossing his legs and re-opening his book.

After finding that he had remembered almost every detail to each question, Snape leaned back with a look of sour insatiateness on his face. There was something rather dissatisfying about making good grades if there was no one to show them to. _Well, at least it will make things easier back home, _he concluded grimly. 

He glanced towards laughter from nearby, and realized that Potter's gang was lounging under the enormous beech tree on the shore of the lake. Black was there. Quickly remembering the breakfast episode, he packed his belongings back in his satchel, and stood up slowly, in hopes of avoiding his schoolmate's eyes. He stopped. _What am I doing?_ he berated himself. _Have I really become this beaten down?_ Disgusted with his behavior, he thrust his chest out resolutely and started off across the lawn, not twenty feet away from the beech tree.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw that Black spied him and had developed a hungry look on his face. _Get ready…Just keep walking. _Black got to his feet and walked over to take a place next to Potter as Potter smirked and abruptly yelled out, "All right, Snivilus?"

_Now!_ Severus delved into his robes for his wand, and had just raised it to hear _"Expelliarmus!"_ and felt the instrument slip from his fingers. He stood slightly crouched, whipping about to face his attackers. Black was clutching his stomach with laughter. _If I can just get my wand!_

Spotting his wand behind him, he made to leap after it but heard _"Impedimenta!"_ and felt his limbs slow, as if he was wading. Luckily the ground was soft as he fell onto it face-first with a sickening thud. He looked up helplessly to see Potter looming over him, and approaching was a small crowd of jeering onlookers.

"So…how'd the exam go, _Snivelly_?" Potter sneered.

Black gazed down at him with a cruel smile. "I was watching him, his nose was touching the parchment. There'll be great greasy marks all over it, they won't be able to read a word." _Wait a minute,_ thought some part of Severus's mind. _He was watching me? _He began struggling against the jinx, fighting the bonds that weren't there. He looked up again to see the crowd laughing at his predicament, and his anger began to glow white-hot.

"You – wait," he gasped, the jinx making breathing difficult. 

Potter smirked. "What, you going to wipe your nose on us, Snivelly?" he laughed.

Severus saw red. "_Expelliarmus_! _Diffindo_! Oh, _Engorgio_, anything! You stinking bastard, I'll kill you!" He looked at his wand, willing it to come to him.

_"Scourgify!"_ Potter muttered, and Severus was suddenly choking and hacking over a mouthful of soapsuds.

Sirius had been vastly entertained by the spectacle of Snape being picked on, but now the show was getting a little too extreme. He watched James laughing as Snape sputtered and spat, trying to get rid of the suds, and felt guilt well up inside. "Jim, shouldn't you-"

"Leave him ALONE!" cried an unfamiliar voice. The soapsuds began to subside and Severus lay panting with his face in the grass.

Potter cleared his throat, and in a more mature tone greeted the owner of the voice. "All right, Evans?"

"Leave him alone," the voice repeated. "What's he done to you?"

Severus looked up at his savior to see that she was none other than Lily Evans. Her bright green eyes flashes at James. "Well," James kicked the ground and grinned up at her. "It's more the fact that he _exists_, if you know what I mean…." This comment got a laugh out of almost everybody. Lily surveyed the boy disapprovingly.

"You think you're so funny, but you're just a arrogant, bullying toerag, Potter. Leave him _alone_."

"I will if you go out with me Evans. Go out with me, and I'll never touch old Snivelly again," Potter promised. He turned briefly to Sirius to see a look of approval.

Severus had wriggled almost to his wand, straining his arm against the remainder of the Impediment jinx. Lily looked disgustedly at James. "Why, you…I wouldn't go out with you if it was a choice between you and the giant squid!"

"Bad luck, Prongs," said Sirius, who turned to see Snape pointing his wand towards James. _"Fer-Fernunculus!" _Snape snarled. The jinx shot past Sirius to graze Potter's face, spattering blood. James spun on his heel and yelled, "_Mobiliarbus_!" and an instant later, Severus was hanging upside-down, his robes fallen about his head. Blinded, Severus began thrashing at the fabric, trying to push it over his face, and then, judging from the laughter, had the sickening realization that everyone could probably see his dingy underwear.

"James Potter, you let him down!"

Instantly, Severus fell with a thud to the ground, and struggled to stand. He grasped his wand and pointed it directly at Sirius.

_Oh, dung._ Sirius yelled out the only hex he could think of, _"Locomotor Mortis!"_

Severus's limbs snapped to his sides, and again he found himself with sod in his mouth.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" screeched Lily, finally whipping out her own wand and directing it at the offenders.

James instantly stopped laughing and glanced warily at Sirius then back to the menacing wand pointed at them. "Don't make me hex you, Evans."

Lily looked incredulous. "Then take the curse off!"

James kicked the ground again. "You're lucky Evans was here, Snivillus," he sighed, and mumbled the countercurse.

Severus stumbled and leapt to his feet, furious. He was humiliated enough, but to not be able to fight his own battles was simply mortifying. He spat, "I don't need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!" but was immediately sorry. He had his prejudices, but never voiced them. Lily looked momentarily hurt, but then indifferent.

"Fine. Next time I won't bother." She turned to walk away, then paused. "And I'd wash my pants if I were you, _Snivillus_."

Potter looked enraged. He aimed his wand again at Snape, and yelled "Apologize, now!"

Lily turned her cold stare on James. "I don't want you to _make_ him apologize."

James and Lily verbally sparred for a minute more, not noticing Severus trembling, struggling to properly stand. _My wand!_ He knelt and picked up his wand from the grass, and quickly stowed it in his robes. He managed to get to his feet just as Evans whirled and left James yelling after her. "Right…" he said turning back to Sirius. "Right." Severus was slowly hobbling away when he felt himself once again flipped into the air.

"Who wants to see me take off Snivelly's pants?" James announced maliciously. Sirius saw the dangerous glow in his eye, and put a hand on his arm. "Jim, let's go back inside. Come on then. It must be almost lunch."

Severus saw his chance as Sirius momentarily distracted James. "_Flipendo_!" he yelled just as his robes fell down over his face. Both other boys went flying backwards and landed on their backs a few feet away. With a crack, Severus fell onto his head. Sirius was the first to be up again, and suddenly didn't feel sorry for Snape. He drew his wand up with a wave and –

"Mr. Black. I'd advise you not to do that." Sirius felt a wiry hand clamp down on his shoulder and was stunned to look into the solemn face of Professor McGonagall. "Mr. Potter, would you be so kind as to help Mr. Snape to his feet." James looked disgusted, and walked over to the boy who was still floundering in his tangled robes. James grabbed an arm and roughly helped Snape up. Upon seeing who aided him, Severus wrenched his arm away and scowled.

"Mr. Snape, I'm surprised at you, participating in childish fights. You're usually so well behaved. Forty points from Slytherin." Severus's eyes widened and he opened his mouth to protest, but the professor had turned to face the other two. "And you…I wish I could say this is unexpected. For the both of you, sixty points from Gryffindor. Now, come with me."

The three of them were marched back into the castle.

Come on. Push that little purple button fellas. I need the encouragement. :P


	2. Lily Evans

UPDATED: new sketches! 

It thinks it's outsmarted me. Not a chance. See if you can figure out the addresses for the images. Hint: it's in code.

Snapes: 

(http) (colon) (slash) (slash) askandrea (dot) (com) (slash) sally (slash) snapes1.jpg

Snape and Lily (very rough):

(http) (colon) (slash) (slash) askandrea (dot) (com) (slash) sally (slash) snape&lily.jpg

please figure it out! They go with the story.

My, this is so exciting! They just keep doing whatever they want. I'm so close to 10,000 words I can taste it. And if anyone out there is like me, I search for stories that are 10000 words or more only. Well, best get this posted so I can get on to chapter 3!

Chapter 2

Sirius and Snape sat on opposite ends of a hard bench right outside McGonagall's office. Inside one could barely hear the professor's controlled lecturing. _Boy, he's been in there a while_, thought Sirius nervously. He could only imagine the punishments that were befalling his best friend, and the idea made him seethe with anger at the young man sitting a few feet from him. He casually glanced over at the sallow teen. Severus was hunched over with his hands in his face, his raven hair knotted in his fingers, and Sirius could barely see the gentle rise and fall of his back. The image made him feel a bit regretful. 

_It really wasn't his fault, I guess. He almost shouldn't be punished_.

He gazed down at his wand for a moment. "She'll probably go easy on you." He paused. "We started it, really."

Silence. Severus was being flooded with a dozen emotions: fierce anger for the boy sitting next to him; anxiety about losing so many points for his house. But mostly, he felt cold, agonizing fear. _Oh gods, don't let her tell father. I'll do anything; just don't let her tell him_, he repeated in his mind.

Sirius was not about to give up. "You really don't have anything to worry about…" he ventured, scooting towards Severus a few inches. "Sniv-…Snape?"

Snape remained with his face in his hands, seemingly ignoring his surroundings.

"Come on, Snape, say something," Sirius coaxed a bit impatiently, scooting closer. "You're sore at Jim? We didn't really mean anything by it…'sides, you deserved it after this morning."

Nothing. Sirius watched Snape's back rising and falling again, and for some silly reason imagined what would happen if he placed a book on it. He scooted closer, now only about a foot away from the other boy, and began to pick at a thread on his lap. "Come on, it's not all that bad–"

He felt a violent shove and was thrown to the floor. Looming over him was Severus, looking clammy and sickly, his fists in balls. "You have no idea how bad it is! You and your idiot friends don't know anything about anything, you hear me?" he hissed.

"You prat, I'm just trying to help!" Sirius shouted, getting to his feet.

Severus sneered. "Ha! Well some help you've been!" he shouted back, leaning menacingly towards the other boy.

At that moment, the Professor opened her door to find the two young men standing, glaring at each other threateningly. "Boys, control yourselves!" she stressed. 

Slowly, the two lowered their fists, not breaking eye contact. "Go into my office _now_, please." McGonagall herded them through the doorway into the office, which was decorated with dark wood and deep reds. James was sitting in one of the two red leather armchairs in front of the professor's desk. "You may leave now, Mr. Potter," she said sternly. James slowly got up and started walking out of the room, and gave Sirius a strange, scared look as they passed each other.

"Have a seat." McGonagall strode around her desk and sat with a creak. She looked at one boy and then the other, steepling her fingers. Severus nervously sat with his arms crossed and began to glance around the room. There was an enormous grandfather clock in the corner behind the desk ticking away, even though the pendulum was still. On McGonagall's desk was a stuffed hawk that bore a striking resemblance to its owner. It turned and eyed the boys suspiciously.

Suddenly there was a loud knock at the door that made all three jump. McGonagall shook her head slightly and went to answer it. The boys heard a click and quiet murmuring from over the tall backs of the armchairs. 

"I'm sorry Miss Evans, but I'm busy at the moment." More murmuring. _Lily_, thought Sirius. "No, you may not come in, Miss Evans, I do not care to hear 'your side of the story' right now. If you have something pressing to tell me, it can wait until we are finished." There was an angry huff, and McGonagall closed the door.

"All right boys," she said, getting back to her seat. "From what I heard from Mr. Potter, there have been some injustices this afternoon." Severus nodded and looked smug. Sirius just leaned back into his armchair sullenly.

"I must say again, Mr. Snape, I am quite surprised at you. You are a very good student; excellent in my Transfiguration classes." Snape's smug expression doubled as he glanced over at Sirius. "That's why I find it so disturbing that you would attack Mr. Black unprovoked. At least you had the good fortune that Mr. Potter arrived to stop you from doing any more harm."

Snape swung his head back to the professor, smugness slowly melting into what Sirius could only describe as…nauseated. He gaped at Sirius, who looked back wide-eyed, shaking his head. _I didn't do this! _he tried to mentally convey to the other boy. Severus slowly gripped the arms of his chair, staring at McGonagall in disbelief.

"Now, I considered notifying your father of this matter…" Severus's grip tightened. "…But I decided that it would be best to keep it to ourselves, especially if you two are cooperative."

Sirius leaned forward, scrunching his eyebrows. "But, Professor–"

"Don't worry, Mr. Black. I haven't forgotten you. Even though Severus was the aggressor, you should not have been so violent in your self-defense. Potter told me of the _Mobiliarmus_ charm, and I really don't think that was necessary. In the future, you must alert a teacher if there is a problem." This left Sirius was gaping as well. _But that was James!_ _I cannot believe he would do something like this! I'll kill him!_

"Now, for your punishment. Since the two of you obviously need to learn to respect each other, I have assigned you both to detention three times a week, for the next month. Together." Severus choked. The boys' looks of frustration were quickly replaced with those of angry astonishment. _Oh gods,_ thought Severus. _This is almost as bad as her telling my father!_

"The detentions will begin tomorrow evening, promptly as six. You will report to Mr. Filch in the dungeons. If either one of you are late, both your parents _will_ be notified," she added. "Do either of you have any questions?" The two were so mutually shocked that neither could think of what to say.

McGonagall leaned back and gave them a chagrining look of satisfaction. "Well, good. That is all settled. You may go," and she gestured towards the door.

•

"I said I'm sorry already!" James dodged a hurtling shoe. 

Sirius rounded the four-poster bed hopping on one foot, trying to remove his other shoe. 

"Get back here Prongs! You slimy, wretched, insufferable git!" James leapt over the next bed, but caught his foot and fell with a crash to the other side, knocking off his glasses. 

"You idiot! Even you couldn't be this stupid! How could you?!" Sirius yelled as he nimbly jumped onto the bed, shoe in hand. James cowered below on the floor, covering his head. "I'm sorry! If you'd just let me explain–" 

"Explain! Yeah, I'd like you to explain! Like, explain how I am suddenly Snivillus's hot date every other night for a _month_! I'd _love_ to hear an explanation about that one!" He drew back the shoe. 

"Wait! No! Just hold on a second!" James lifted himself up on his elbows, searching for his glasses. "Just listen. I didn't know what to do back there. McGonagall just suggested a few scenarios, and I simply agreed with her. Maybe I exaggerated a bit–" Sirius lifted his shoe again, 

"Whoa, hold on!" James continued. "Listen. I've just been in trouble too many times this semester already. I knew she'd call my folks this time if she knew what really happened. I thought you could take the rap for me this once…I just didn't have time to consult you about it." James gave an innocent shrug.

Sirius lowered the shoe and rolled his eyes. "Jim, that was a damn fool thing to do." He sat down with a sigh. "Now, not only do I have to spend all that time with Snape, he's gonna hate my guts even more than before. I didn't think that was possible!"

Jim raised his eyebrows. "What do you care if Snivillus hates you?"

"I dont," Sirius retorted quickly, "He'll just make everything living hell... He didn't deserve it, James. That was really stinking of you."

"There you go again! I thought that would be the one thing that would soften the blow! Yeah, you get detention, but you get to see Snivillus suffer too!" James said heatedly.

Sirius was livid. "Yeah, right next to me, you prat!" He threw the shoe anyway, spun on his heel, and stormed out of the dormitory.

•

Severus dragged his feet down the hall. _A month! A month with that, that- argh! What am I going to do...?_ he thought miserably. _At least nobody else knows_. 

He made his way towards the Great Hall for a late lunch. Passing through the archways, he saw that the little desks were gone and the customary house tables were back in their rightful place. The room seemed to glow, and he thought for a fleeting moment that maybe the tables were glad to be back. 

As he shuffled along past to the Slytherin table, he could see out of the corner of his eye that his housemates were shooting him angry glances. Some whispered to each other and nodded their heads towards him, and he thought he heard the word "points" hissed. _Oh no. So much for lunch._

Severus reached the very end of his table and sat, shoulders hunched and looking warily around him. He looked at the plates of food lining the center of the table. _I'm not hungry at all._

He heard laughter somewhere behind him, and turned to see red hair. _Lily_. She was sitting near the middle of the Gryffindor table talking animatedly with her friends. He still felt guilty about what he had said to her before. His family…they had always been very prejudiced against non-Wizarding families. He didn't mean to feel the way he did, but being brought up with it constantly ringing around him, it was bound to rub off a bit. 

_I really ought to apologize, _he slowly realized. Though he hated the idea, imagining himself stooping to the level of Potter and his friends disgusted him. Glancing down his own table to see the frowns directed at him, he thought, _now is as good a time as any._

He swung his legs over the bench and stood, straightening his robes and raking his fingers through his hair. Striding quickly, robes whirling behind him, he reached Lily's seat and noisily cleared his throat.

Lily finished what she had been saying and laughed, and turned around to see who was behind her. Her laughing face instantly turned icy. "Yes?" she said, drawing out the "s". All around them people were chattering and laughing; silver and plates were clinking.

Severus cleared his throat again and his pallid skin turned a light pink. "I was wondering if I could speak with you for a moment," he mumbled.

"What's that?" Lily turned her ear toward the boy. The girls sitting around her giggled.

Severus felt a bit annoyed. "_I said_, I was wondering if I could talk to you, please."

Lily gazed up at him condescendingly and crossed her arms. "So talk." More giggling.

He gritted his teeth. "I was hoping we could speak _privately_." He eyed the other girls.

Lily looked off somewhere in the distance for a moment, and then looked back up at the gangly young man. "Why should I?"

Severus sighed and slumped a bit. "Please."

Lily frowned and rolled her eyes, and turned to her friends. "I'll be right back." She got up and led Severus to one of the enormous archways. "All right," she said once they were blocked from the view of the Hall, putting her hands on her hips. "What do you want?"

Seeing her looking at him so angrily, Severus almost lost his nerve. "Uh…I–" He sighed and looked at his shoes. "I wanted to apologize." 

Lily's expression softened. "What?" She glanced around suspiciously. "Has Potter got his wand on you from somewhere?" she asked, looking over his shoulder. Severus sneered.

"No. I'm doing this of my own accord." He gazed down into her eyes. "I was wrong to say what I did. I really don't regard you in that way. You've never been anything but kind to me. I was just extremely–"

"Humiliated?" Lily offered.

Severus's lip curled at the memory. "Yes. And then the fact that you came to my rescue–"

Lily nodded with understanding. "It made you feel even worse."

"Exactly." They stood in silence for a minute.

"Well, I accept your apology" she said solemnly.

Severus gave her a small, relieved smile. "Thank you. I guess I'll let you get back to your lunch then."

Lily blinked. "Aren't you going to eat anything?"

"How do you know I hadn't eaten?" Severus questioned. Lily blushed and smiled at him. 

"Magic… You know, our table has some great Chinese food on it today. Would you care to come have some?"

Severus suddenly looked nervous and started twisting a long, black strand of hair from the back of his head. "Sit with Gryffindors? Uh, I don't know about that… there's that small risk of being _stoned_ to death, you know."

"Oh, don't be silly," Lily smiled. "You'll be safe with me" she winked, shaking a fist. Severus slumped at the comment and gesture. Lily rolled her eyes. "Oh, come on." She grabbed him by his skinny arm and dragged him back out to the Hall.

They got back to her seat, and she motioned at one of the girls to move over.

"Surely you're not going to let him sit _here_, are you?" asked a girl who was also a red head, though she had frizzier curls than Lily's.

Lily continued making a place for Severus. "Yes Molly, I am." The chattering around the middle of the table abruptly died down. A few of the girls got up and left, and Lily sighed as she watched them go. "I guess it's a good way to weed out your real friends," she shrugged. "Have a seat."

Molly had a look of distaste on her face, but said nothing. Severus sat upright like he was strapped to a board, feeling that he had never been more uncomfortable in his life. It seemed like every eye was on him. Lily must have noticed, because she quickly grabbed a plate and started loading it with food. "Here, Severus," she handed the plate to him. "Try the almond chicken. It's terrific."

Severus picked at the food. "I didn't know that you knew my real name." Lily turned to him and smiled warmly, blushing again. 

"I've always known your name," she replied. Slowly, the talking and laughing resumed, and Severus felt almost at ease again. 

After lunch, the rest of the day went by relatively quickly. He read and did homework for most of the evening in the Slytherin common room. As Severus settled down into his bed, even though he knew he had the detention from hell the next day, he thought he hadn't felt so relaxed in a long time.

•

Severus awoke in the middle of the night, which was not uncommon, but lying awake, he began to hear things. The Slytherin dormitory was completely dark. There was loud, harsh whispering coming from the corners of the room. 

"Greasy lit-…-lost a slough-…"

"…-want to beat the-…-him-…-points-…-can't win-…-quidditch."

_Oh gods, _he thought, realizing their subject. _I have to get out of here! _He quietly slipped his legs out from under the covers and onto the floor. He had only gotten a few feet from his bed when he stepped on a weak spot in the wood, which let out a dreadful creak. 

"Crabbe!" said a hoarse whisper. "That you?"

_What do I do!? _Snape froze in place, not daring to answer.

"Oy, Tristan! See who that is," called out the whisper.

Severus heard a murmured incantation and saw a point of light grow out of the middle of the darkness to his left. He looked at it like a deer in headlights.

"It's him! He's up!" said Tristan in a full out yell.

Severus snapped out of his trance and sprinted towards the door. Something caught his collar and his feet flew out from under him. He fell to the hardwood floor, his head cracking against it. 

"Oughh…" he groaned.

"Come on and get up you slimy bastard." Someone kicked him hard in the ribs. All around him Severus could make out the shapes of legs and feet. He struggled to his knees, and then braced himself with his hands as he got up, swaying.

"I think…I have a concussion…" he said. The dark shapes were spinning.

"Yeah, you better hope that's the worst you get. You're stupidity may have lost us the quidditch cup, you idiot. And we're going to teach you a little lesson."

"T'wasn't my fault–" he managed to get out before he felt a fist connect solidly with his eye. He spun and fell to the floor in a heap.

"No–…don't…" Something hid him hard in the stomach, and he gasped for air.

At that moment, he couldn't feel any more of the pain. He knew they were hitting him over and over again, but vaguely, as if the blows were feather-light touches. They left him lying facedown, off to one side of the door with a trickle of blood streaming from his mouth. No one bothered to help him until he awoke at the students coming back from lunch the following day.

•

Lily didn't see Severus at breakfast the next day. She sat with a view of the Slytherin table, watching to see if he showed up. _I'm sure he just had some homework to finish up or something,_ she thought, reassuring herself.

But then he was missing at lunchtime too. Worry began to nag at the edges of Lily's thoughts. She decided to pack a few muffins into her bag before leaving to find the boy. Her shoes clicked as she marched down the hall to the Gryffindor common room, where the portrait of the fat lady gave her an appraising look.

"Well, don't we look determined!"

"_Crackers_" shouted Lily.

"I most certainly am not!" retorted the fat lady, but swung open the portrait hole anyway.

Lily stomped through the common room and climbed the stairs to the boy's dormitory. Nearest to the door there was a pair of oversized feet hanging off the end of a bed. She drew out her wand and aimed at the feet.

"Sirius Black!" The feet jumped, and Sirius stuck his head out of the curtains around his bed. He looked at her with disdain.

"Yes, Evans?" he drawled.

"What did you do with him? I know it was one of you! Where is he?" she shouted.

"Where is who?" Sirius squinted, his dark hair falling in his face.

Lily stepped menacingly towards the bed. "You know perfectly well who!" She waited for him to confirm her thoughts, but he only stared at her blankly. "**_Severus_****!** What did you do to him?"

"Severus…" He thought for a moment. "Oh, you mean Snivillus! Um…"

Lily glared at him. "Well?"

"No idea where he is, really." Sirius shrugged. "Why?"

"You better not be lying," said Lily as she waved her wand over her head.

Sirius pulled his head back behind the curtains. "Don't hex me Evans! I swear I don't know where he is!"

Lily sighed and lowered her wand. "Does Potter know?"

"I don't think Jim would have done anything, especially after the talking-to I gave him yesterday," he said as he cautiously peaked out of the curtains again.

Lily sighed again and sat on the bed next to Sirius's. "I don't know what to do then. He wasn't at breakfast or lunch. I wish I could get into the Slytherin tower, but I don't know the password. I'm not even sure where the entrance is. I just have this horrible feeling that something's wrong."

Sirius rolled his eyes and pulled the curtains back. "Turn around Evans. I'll help you, but you have to give me a bit of privacy. Of all the stupid things…going to save Snivillus…He's probably just sulking in his dorm because of what happened yesterday," he muttered as he yanked on his robes.

"I thought about that, but it wouldn't make any sense. Why would he have gone to lunch yesterday, but not today?" said Lily, facing the dormitory door.

"Stay there," he told her as he walked to another bed.

"Thanks for helping me, Sirius. I just hope that we're not too late."

"I'm not doing it for you as much as myself," he lied. "If Snape doesn't make it to detention tonight, McGonagall will tell both our parents about what happened yesterday." Sirius dug through James's wardrobe and finally pulled out a shimmery wad of cloth. _James owes me anyways_, he thought as he stowed to translucent mass into his bag.

"Come on, Evans," he mumbled.

They left the Gryffindor tower and crept down the halls. Sirius seemed to know exactly where they were going; he went around every corner confidently. They reached a dark, echoing hall. One side of it was bare stone, and the other side had a deep alcove cut into it containing a tall suit of armor. They clamored back behind the armor where Sirius spoke in an urgent whisper.

"Here's what we're going to do. We'll wait for a Slytherin to go in, and run in behind him."

Lily gave him an incredulous look. "Oh, classic. And how do you propose we do that without being noticed by said Slytherin, hmm _General_?"

"With this," said Sirius as he drew the material out of his bag.

Lily's face lit up. "Excellent! An invisibility cloak! Where did you get it?"

"Never mind that," Sirius frowned and threw it over their shoulders.

•

Severus groaned and tried to roll over. His face was swollen and when he tried to open his eyes, the left one throbbed excruciatingly. There was a metallic, salty taste in his mouth and he tried to spit off to one side. Something hard passed his lips, and he reached up wincingly to pick it off his chin. He held it up to the light. It was a bloody tooth. His eyes crossed and he promptly passed out again.

•

The two Gryffindors had managed to sneak in behind a Slytherin unnoticed. As they tiptoed through the dank common room, Lily noticed the uninviting nature of the place. Unlike the Gryffindor commons, which was carpeted, there wasn't a shred of carpet in the room they were presently in. Green and black banners hung from the ceilings, and torches burned bright green every few feet along the walls. Sirius led her purposefully to the bottom of a spiral staircase. As they began to climb, a thought struck Lily.

"You've been in here before, haven't you?" she whispered.

"That's none of your business. Be quiet unless you want someone to hear!" he snapped hoarsely. Lily raised an eyebrow at him. Sirius frowned.

"Yes, I've been here once or twice; to plant some dung bombs in the common room," he acquiesced. 

Lily looked confused. "But then how do you know where the dorms are–"

"Shh!" he hissed as they got to the top of the stairs. They didn't have to go very far into the room before they glimpsed a figure heaped on the floor, and Sirius's stomach dropped in recognition. Luckily no one else was present, because Lily shrieked and ran to the figure's side. "Oh my god!"

•

Severus awoke to find that the floor he was lying on wasn't hard and brown, but bore an uncanny resemblance to white sheets. _Wait. That's not right_…he thought, confusedly. He tried to open his eyes wider, but the left one still throbbed. He slowly turned to his side and squinted around._ The infirmary. How did I get here? _He suddenly felt a shooting pain in his midsection and doubled over with a gasp. He felt a warm hand on his shoulder.

"Madame Pomphrey! Come quick!" said a voice above him that could only be Lily's. Severus heard footsteps hastily approaching.

"He's all right Ms. Evans, it's just his ribs mending." He suddenly felt a cooling sensation where the pain had been moments ago.

"That ought to help. Now, you best leave him for a while, so he'll be out in time for his detention this evening," said Madame Pomphrey with a wink and bustled off.

Lily sat down on the edge of the hospital bed. Her hand, which had been on Severus's shoulder, slid down to hold his own. He unconsciously cringed at the unfamiliar contact, but then relaxed. Her hand was soft and soothing. He turned to look at her, and she smiled at him with a mixture of warmth and pity.

"How did I get here?" he croaked.

Lily frowned. "Oh…well, I noticed that you didn't come to breakfast or lunch, and I got a little worried. So I went looking for you."

"You mean _we_ went looking for him," said a familiar voice from the end of the bed. Severus squinted at the figure darkened by the afternoon light shining into his eyes. The figure began to become more focused and Severus could just make out that it was–

"Black!" he wheezed, trying to sit up. Sirius backed up instinctively.

"Yes, he helped me find you, Severus," Lily cut in quickly.

Severus snarled as much as his swollen face would allow. "I would have rather you'd left me there if he was involved!"

Lily's brilliant green eyes flashed. "Severus! Quit being stupid! He may very well have saved your life. I couldn't have helped you without him," she snapped. Sirius sighed.

"It's ok, Lily. I'd better go anyways. I want to spend as little time around him as possible, seeing as I'm going to be with him for the whole evening." 

In truth, he didn't want to leave at all. As he had watched Severus curled up on the bed, covered in bruises, anger had begun to bubble up inside of him. _Those Slytherin maggots, _he thought. _Their own housemate!_ An annoying voice in his mind spoke up. 

_But you and your friends harass him daily. What's the difference?_

He scowled at the idea. _That's different. We just rough him up a little, not kick him unconscious._

The voiced nagged again. _Why do you care anyways? It's just like James said…_

_I don't!_ he reiterated to himself. He regretfully turned and started out of the infirmary, calling over his shoulder, "See you at six, Snape. Don't be late, or it'll be both our necks," and he was gone.

Lily watched Sirius leave and then turned back to Severus with a troubled look. 

"So what happened up there–"

"Why was he here, Evans?" Severus cut her off, pulling his hand from hers.

Lily burned with frustration. "I _told_ you, he helped me find you."

Snape's lip curled. "Well I wish you'd left me to bleed to death! Can you imagine how horrid it would be if it became common knowledge that he participated in my _rescue_?" he sneered. "I'd never be able to live it down!"

"Severus, I really don't think he'd tell anyone. Wouldn't it be just as embarrassing for him? Really…I would have thought you'd be a _little_ appreciative–"

"Ms. Evans," he cut her off again. "I appreciate your bringing me to the infirmary. That is all. I don't need or want anything more. And we're not so chummy that we're on a first name basis, so please act accordingly. Now leave me alone," he said frigidly, and turned to face away from her.

"Of all the…" Lily was hurt for a moment, but then, thinking about what he had been through, decided that it would be best to give him some time by himself. 

"Alright." She got up with a sigh and made her way out of the infirmary. Severus laid staring at the wall, a mixture of guilt, embarrassment and overpowering sadness seething behind his cold demeanor. _Thank you…Lily._

_•_

If you review me, I'll give you a big kiss…


	3. Detention and Discoveries

YAY! New chapter! Sorry it's taken a bit longer, I've got finals right now. Yes, I know this chapter isn't quite as long as the 2nd, but it's longer than the first! And I've cleared 10,000 words! Woohoo! Has anyone figured out the picture addresses yet? Here's a new one, my new favorite:

askandrea dot com slash sally slash sirius.jpg

It's lovely. I know you'll like it.

Time for thanks and such:

**Yumi-no-baka: **hurray for being my first reviewer!

**HPSlashFan:** sure you don't want a smooch? ¬_¬

**Fany:** Yeah, I'm trying to be as realistic as possible.

**Jinsei:** first, thanks! Second, shhhh!

**TheMadHatter33:** again, yeah I'm trying to stick to reality, thanks for noticing ^_^

**Localgod325. **¬_¬ hi Sam. You're such a dork.

**Rikku Motomiya:** yay! I'm a favorite!

**Viu:** so am i…

**Neurotic Squirell:** whoa. I'm working working working working on it.

**Mydracomalfoy:** you should! His life sucks, doesn't it?

And very special thanks to my great sister Toni, who has beta-ed every bit of this story. It would suck without her. Seriously.

And now…..*drum roll*

Chapter 3 

At five-thirty Severus was awakened by a cool, leathery hand on his forehead.

"Lily?" he squinted in confusion. 

"Not by about forty years, Mr. Snape," said the kindly voice of Madame Pomphrey. "I do believe you're just about fit to leave," she stated, looking closely at his left eye. "That eye will still be a shiner, but it won't be as painful as before. And your ribs have healed perfectly."

Severus sat up. "I didn't have a concussion then?"

"Oh, nothing nearly that exciting, no," reassured the nurse. "Just a bump."

He felt over the back of his head, and sure enough there was a knot. As he ran his fingers over it, he noticed that it didn't hurt at all. Pomphrey must have put some kind of pain-relief charm on me, he realized. It reminded him nauseatingly of the way the beating had felt.

The setting sun shone through the west windows of the infirmary, painting the rows of hospital beds a rich pink. The light glistened through shelves of bottles to his right, which cast hazy little reflections all over the white walls. He glanced back to the end of the bed at Madame Pomphrey in her white nurse's hat and apron and noticed that she was writing something on a clipboard.

"Uh, Madame Pomphrey…are you going to–" he started.

"Don't worry dear," she said with a wink. "I've already been sworn to secrecy over the whole matter. Now, you best get a move on or you'll be late for detention."

Severus frowned as he remembered the obligation, and then slowly got up and began to dress. _I can picture it now_, he thought with a sneer. _That fathead gloating over me the whole time…this will be lovely._

•

Sirius had been ten minutes early for the detention, but was not in any hurry to go inside Filch's office. He had been in the place a few times in the past, but the smell was so wretched he almost dreaded it more than Filch himself. Instead of entering, he leaned against the wall outside with his hands deep in his pockets.

_I hope Snape shows up. I really don't want Mum and Dad to hear James's twisted version of all this._ His thoughts drifted back to the sleeping boy in the infirmary. _He doesn't really look that bad when he's sleeping. Maybe it's the lack of a sour expression. They sure did beat him good, though._ At that moment, he turned and saw the subject of his thoughts walking carefully along the dark hallway. 

It was obvious that Severus was trying to move as little as possible. The stiff fabric of his black robes shifted around his scrawny frame as he shuffled along.

"Hey Snape. Glad you could make it," he said as sarcastically as he could and pushed himself off the wall. Severus scowled at him silently and walked up to the rough wooden door to pause in front of it. Sirius grinned at his hesitation.

"Oh, he's in there all right. I just didn't want to be in that filth for any longer than I had to be, you know?"

Severus sighed and turned to the boy with a look of distaste. "What time is it?"

Sirius raised his eyebrows and quickly reached into his pocket to pull out an old-fashioned brass pocket watch. " It's five fifty-five on the dot," he said as he wound the timepiece. He noticed Severus staring at it and smiled. "It's not electronic. You know how Muggle electronics work in Hogwarts. Or rather, how they don't. You've got to wind it with this little key here," he said as he held up the key on the end of the fob.

Snape smirked at the object and turned back to the intimidating door in front of him. Sirius watched him for a moment before frowning and dropping the watch back into his pocket.

"Look, I just want to say that I'm–" he started, but Severus quickly grasped the doorknob and pushed through into the room.

Sirius grimaced at being cut off, but then shrugged and followed the other boy. He was greeted by a stench that was reminiscent of rotting fish. Inside, under a lantern swinging from the ceiling, Filch was sitting at a sturdy oak desk covered in stacks of papers. _Boy, compared to Filch, Severus's skin looks perfect,_ mused Sirius. Filch's stringy brown hair hung down over his face as he looked over a pamphlet in his hands. He noticed the boys and hastily shoved the pamphlet into a drawer.

The boys approached the desk cautiously and stopped a few feet from it, taking care to stay a good distance from each other as well. The walls were lined with tall filing cabinets with words printed on their fronts. Condensation was dripping from the ceiling. Leaning back, Filch gave them an appraising glance.

"I suppose you'll be 'ere for punishment then," he said with a sinister grin. "I've got something very special arranged just for the occasion, too."

He spun around in his chair to open a high cabinet behind him. When he turned back he was holding two toothbrushes, one green and one red, in his gnarled left hand.

"There's great gobs o' creeping mold all o'er the grout in the dungeons. You'll be starting with the Potions rooms," he snickered and got up from the desk, hooked a finger from his remaining hand through the handle of a rusty metal jug sitting near the door, and shuffled out of the room. Severus immediately followed, but Sirius paused for a moment, and then grudgingly followed as well.

Filch led them meandering through the dank halls and passageways down to the dungeons where they halted at the latticed entrance. There were two torches burning dimly on either wall. The crooked man dragged past the boys and whispered something unintelligible through the frame. The door instantly swung open with a groan. Inside there was nothing but darkness. Filch turned to the two and sneered.

"Go on, then," he gestured towards the abyss.

Hesitatingly, Severus began to walk through the doorway. A few steps in, he heard a little bell ring, and suddenly the room erupted in light. Torches systematically lit one after the other around the expanse of the dungeon and he spun to watch their progress. As he turned, he saw that Sirius was following them as well. The boy looked to Severus briefly and gave a little half-smile.

"I guess I've never seen them turn the lights on before," Sirius said with a shrug.

Filch sneered and set down the jug with a clang. "That over there is where you'll be startin'," he pointed to the far left corner of the room. Turning to Sirius, he held up the toothbrushes.

"Pick a color," he said with a scowl.

Sirius cringed and chose the red toothbrush and Severus reached over for the green.

Filch pointed at the rusty can. "Tha' there's bleach. Pour it on and get scrubbing. Bet'er not be one speck left."

Severus stepped forward eyeing his toothbrush and then the bleach. "But shouldn't we have gloves?"

Filch's face broke into a wide grimace.

"Gloves!" he cackled uncontrollably, walking haltingly away from them. He put on a mocking voice. "Shouldn't we have gloves? Ha!" He suddenly flared around and squinted at them from outside the door.

"NO TALKING," he barked, and the door slammed in their faces with a reverberating boom.

They stood gaping at the entrance until the last echo had died.

"Well," Sirius said shortly. "No gloves then."

Snape smirked and turned to survey the moldy floor. _I guess that's why it's called creeping mold_, he thought. The residue had long, black, tendril-shaped trails leading all over the floor in a pattern that looked like ivy. He bent down to take a closer look and realized that the substance was deeply imbedded in the grout. It glittered in the torchlight like it was wet, but it felt like dry sand. Sirius sighed.

"Best get started," he said, reaching for the jug. He raised it with a slosh and began to sprinkle the bleach on the floor. "This is certainly going to be a job. I'll bet we spend three nights working on this. How long do we stay each night?"

Severus stood in silence, gripping his toothbrush. Sirius bent over to get splash bleach in the corner, and turned his head back at the other boy. Severus glared back defiantly.

"Right…why don't you start over in that corner there?" suggested Sirius, pointing to the corner to his left. "I'll just try to put a dent in it right here," he pointed to a thick deposit of the stuff at his feet. 

Rolling up his sleeves and kneeling onto one knee, he poured a dash of bleach right onto the middle of the lump and started scrubbing. He saw with delight that it seemed to disappear within seconds. 

_Well that's easy enough! Maybe it won't take so long after all. _He moved on to another tendril that looked surprisingly like the first. After rubbing it for a moment, it also disintegrated. He sighed with relief. 

_We'll be able to finish this today…what's this? _He noticed that to his left was a large lump that looked very much like the first two. Suspiciously, he started scrubbing it, watching very closely. As he scrubbed, the material seeped off to one side to form an entirely new spot a few inches away. He huffed angrily.

"Damn. There had to be a hitch," he muttered and glanced to the other boy. Severus seemed to be having similar results. He was swatting at the retreating mold with his free hand while jabbing it with the toothbrush, but it was no use. The substance simply moved off to one side.

Sirius turned back to his own spot of mold and sat in thought. Then, leaning forward, he cupped his hand over the lump. Trying to create a seal around it, he jammed the toothbrush under his thumb and scrubbed furiously. It would have worked, but his hand didn't cover enough of the spot to keep it trapped, and it seeped away. _What I need is a few more hands. _The answer suddenly hit him, though he wasn't sure he liked it.

Severus had given up on his corner, and was crouched, glowering at the residue. His sleeves hung limply from his elbows and a film of sweat was appearing on his brow. _Wish it wasn't so sticky in the dungeons._ He wordlessly watched Sirius's attempts at trapping the mold. It kept slipping past a gap and the back of his palm. Severus smirked at the image of the amazing Sirius Black not being able to catch runaway mold. 

Sirius struggled a few more times with the mold and then turned to find that Snape was leaning against one of the dank walls, smirking at him.

Sirius squinted back. "Giving up?"

"When you find out how to get rid of it, I'll be _glad_ to help," Severus said sardonically.

"All right, come here, then. I've figured it out," Sirius retorted, gesturing towards himself. Severus gave him a look of skepticism. 

"I'm telling you, I know how to stop it. Come down here."

Severus hesitantly knelt beside his archenemy. Sirius cupped his hand around one side of the spot of mold and reached towards the other boy, at which Severus jerked away convulsively.

"What are you doing?" he yelped, a glint of fear in his eyes.

"You idiot, I'm just trying to show you my plan," Sirius rolled his eyes. "You've got to help me keep it from getting away. You heard Filch. 'Not one spot left!'" he imitated. 

Severus eyed him suspiciously, but then slowly sank down to the floor again. Sirius smiled at the caution and then began explaining.

"All right, you put your hands on that side of it, and I'll put my hand on this side. If we press them together tight enough, we may be able to stop it." Snape grudgingly put both hands around the spot and Sirius casually put his hand down as well. 

The moment their fingertips met, something that felt a bit like a tiny electric shock went up Sirius's arm. _Whoa… _he thought, stealing a glance at the boy's impassive face. _I mean, yecth_, he recanted.

"When I say go, press against my hand and the ground as hard as you can. Ready?" he asked. Severus gave a curt nod.

"Go!" he shouted and began to scrub furiously at the spot. With no way to escape, the mold bunched from one side of its fleshy prison to the other, and finally drifted back to the center where it faded away to nothing.

"Ha! I knew it," Sirius beamed. Severus suddenly realized that his fingertips were still touching the other boy's palm and quickly pulled away. Getting to his feet, he began to walk back over to the corner he had previously been working on. Sirius gave him a quizzical glance.

"Uh, you're going to have to help me with the rest of these big ones," he pointed at the large remaining tendrils. Snape frowned, and for a moment Sirius thought he'd have to do the rest by himself. Then the sallow boy sighed and pulled his school robe off, revealing a black vest over a cream shirt and olive green slacks. Rolling up his sleeves, Severus settled his hands around the nearest lump.

Sirius grinned. "Ok, on three. One, two, THREE!" and together, they worked at scrubbing the next spot and the next. An indefinite amount of time later, after most of the tendrils had disappeared, Severus sat back on his haunches and looked thoughtfully at his companion who was still trapping the smaller lumps.

_I guess it really wasn't his fault that all this happened. He's still Black though._ He watched Sirius try to get up and stumble onto his backside, laughing at himself.

Severus sighed. "Two hours," he stated quietly.

Sirius stopped pouncing on the mold and turned his head towards the other boy, his eyes wide. "Pardon?"

"That's how long we're supposed to be in here. Two hours per evening."

Sirius let his jaw drop melodramatically. "He speaks," he whispered.

"Shut up and tell me the time," Snape said scowling.

Sirius laughed good-naturedly and stood, pulling his watch out of its pocket. He stared at the little brass bauble.

"Snape…we've been in here almost four hours," he said slowly. Severus looked just as surprised.

"Really? Well, I guess Filch forgot about us," he mused and looked around at the clean floor. "I…guess we ought to go then."

Sirius felt his shoulders slump. The last few hours had been almost…fun. "Yeah, we should," he said with more than a little disappointment in his voice. Who knew that having detention with Snivillus Snape could be so pleasant?

Severus turned and gathered up the toothbrushes and jug of bleach, and slinging his discarded robes over one arm, walked silently through the enormous door. Automatically, Sirius stood and walked after the boy. After trudging up several flights of stairs, they were back in a well-lit hallway. Severus turned and looked at Sirius suspiciously.

"Why are you following me?" he stated more than asked. Sirius scowled right back.

"I'm not. My dorm is in this direction too," he replied smugly. Severus looked troubled but kept walking. 

They rounded a corner, and suddenly Sirius felt something crunch loudly under his heel. Severus heard the noise, and turned to see Sirius pick up what looked like a piece of black plastic with curved grooves in it. Squinting ahead a ways, he could see larger fragments littering the hall. 

"Oh no…" he heard Severus whisper under his breath. The boy bent down to pick up a larger piece and examined it, and quickly took off running down the hall.

Sirius sprinted after him, noticing the black fragments growing progressively as they ran down the corridor. He soon could see the tall suit of armor that stood across from the Slytherin tower entrance. Severus was standing in the middle of the hall, his arms hanging limply. Running up next to him, Sirius saw why the other boy had stopped.

In Severus's hands were two halves of a Muggle record. Or rather, it _had_ been a Muggle record. _So that's what that black plastic was, _Sirius realized.

Looking down, he saw that there was a jumbled pile of what looked like someone's belongings in the middle of the floor. A silver trunk with its lid hanging on one hinge was in the center, its contents of ripped black clothing strewn about. Books were lying open on the ground, and torn pages were scattered everywhere. What Sirius recognized as a little green turntable was mashed in on one side, as if it had been thrown against the wall. Hundreds of shards of record were covering the pile.

"Whoa. Whose stuff is this?" he glanced to his companion. Severus simply looked off into the distance with a blank expression.

"Mine."

Sirius gulped and surveyed the mess before him. _Leave it to Slytherins to stoop even lower, _he thought angrily. Snape leaned down and picked up a ripped set of robes, raining down a shower of shards that made Sirius wince. He stepped towards to pile, but Severus turned a glare on him instantly.

"Go away, Black," he hissed.

"Let me help you–" Sirius started. Severus turned to look down at the debris.

"I don't want your help," he replied, and picked up an armful of clothes that he then dumped unceremoniously into the trunk. Sirius watched this painful process for a few minutes, and then cautiously began to pick up the record shards and place them gently in the trunk as well. Snape paused at the other boy's actions, and then sighed and continued cleaning the pile in silence.

"You know," Sirius began. "You can't really stay here."

Severus sneered at the broken trunk. "That's quite an observation, Black. And where do you suggest I go?" he asked sarcastically.

Sirius paused and ran over the options in his head. There was really only one answer. _They'd _kill_ me if I brought Snape back to the tower,_ he thought and cringed. I can hear James now…_what's with you and Snivillus? Getting a bit close there, aren't you?_ But there was no other choice. He wasn't about to let _anyone_ get beat up if he could help it.

"Er…well…" he started and ran a hand through his hair. Severus looked up at him impatiently

"Oh, come on, Snape," he said, drawing out his wand. "_Locomotor Trunk!"_

The trunk flipped closed haphazardly, levitated off the ground, and began to follow Sirius as he walked back down the hall. Snape jumped to his feet.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing?" he yelped and ran after the boy.

Sirius kept walking. "If you want your trunk, you better follow me," he said curtly.

Severus angrily trailed after Sirius as he strode down the hallway. _Where are we going? I just know there is some new trick they're going to pull on me, but I need my trunk! _After a few minutes of vigorous walking, they halted in front of the portrait of the fat lady.

"Crackers," said Sirius, and the fat lady gave him a hurt look.

"Well, everyone _does_ seem to think so," she sighed, and the portrait hole swung open. Sirius stepped through and glanced back to Snape.

"Come on, then," he said and pointed into the room. Severus raised his eyebrows and scoffed.

"_Oh_, no! I'm not going in there! Not on your life!" he yelled, crossing his arms.

Sirius shrugged. "Your choice." He continued on into the Gryffindor common room with the trunk.

Severus growled at Sirius's tenacity. _I've got no choice! I _must_ have my trunk,_ he realized. Sullenly, he hunched down and stepped through the portrait hole. Walking through a short hallway, he emerged into the common room and was awestruck. _The Slytherin common room looks nothing like this! _Thick red and yellow curtains hung from the walls and the room glowed a faint gold, though there were no torches or candles anywhere to be seen. Looking down, Severus saw that he was standing on a thick oriental tapestry that extended to cover most of the floor. On the left, under a great oak mantle, a large fire blazed lazily in front of two worn in couches. Sirius was laying a blanket out onto one of them.

"I put your trunk there," he pointed to the end of the couch. "You're going to sleep here tonight." Severus opened his mouth to protest, but Sirius cut him off.

"I'm sorry, but you're not in any position to argue. If you want your trunk, you'll have to stay. You may notice that I've put an exceptionally powerful Adhereus Charm on it. It may as well be bolted to the floor."

Severus felt anger swell up inside of him. _I don't need charity from anybody! _He opened his mouth to say so, but Sirius cut him off again.

"No need to thank me," he said with a wave. Severus saw red. "I'm going to bed, I'll send down some pajamas in a minute. Goodnight," he said and walked off, leaving Severus scowling and grasping for words.

•

Sirius woke in the darkness. Looking out the window he saw that the moon was three quarters full, and it was glowing with an eerie light blue.

_I wonder if Snape decided to stay,_ he wondered sleepily. "_Lumos_!" he whispered, and his wand lit up under the sheets.

Picking his watch off the nightstand, he saw that it was well after three in the morning._ I hope those pajamas fit him all right. Maybe I ought to go check on him…_

He slipped his feet out from under the covers and onto the floor, and softly padded past the other beds and crept down the stairs. Reaching the dim common room, he looked over to the crackling fireplace. Peaking over the back of the couch was a shoulder. Sirius grinned inwardly. 

He took a seat on the facing couch and watched the sleeping boy. Severus was curled up on the cushions, blanket pulled tightly around him. He had indeed put on the pajamas, and though they weren't quite long enough in the arms, Sirius could see that they fit well enough. Suddenly, something caught his eye.

Severus's jet-black hair was flipped up on the pillow, revealing the back of his neck. There on the pale skin, Sirius saw something. He held his breath and moved to kneel next to the boy to get a closer look. There were about five or six small round scars dotting Severus's neck. _Those couldn't have been from yesterday,_ he thought. _There wouldn't have been any scarring. These are old…_

Maybe he had been too noisy, or perhaps he was breathing on Severus's neck, because the boy suddenly rolled over and opened his eyes. Sirius froze, unsure of what to do. Severus squinted at him quizzically for a moment in the dim light, and then rolled back over.

_Whew…_Sirius thought, relaxing a bit. _Time to go back to bed. _He carefully stepped away from the couch and crept back upstairs to his bed, where he fell fast asleep.


	4. Madame Butterfly

O, wonderful! More readers……wow, I never thought anyone would like my story. This is really a pretty big shock for me. I've drawn more pics to go with this. I'm worried that no one has said anything about them, as I'm immensely proud of the stupid things. If yall are having trouble finding the pics, just get on aim and I'll send them to you directly.

AmericanWitch: yay! I rock ^_^ I'm glad you like the grease explanation. Sorry, no vampire stuff. I don't really like the so-called Sev/vampire connections. I think he's just pale guy with black hair ¬_¬.

Rikku: now, just hold your horses. All in good time ;)

Mydracomalfoy: woo! I'm a favorite.

Neurotic Squirrel: as you wish.

Daintress: Thankyou ^_^ close but no cigar I'm afraid. 

Once again, a very special thanks to my great sister Toni, who has beta-ed every bit of this story. It would suck without her. Seriously.

And now for a tiny bit of bad news. Yall may have noticed that this chapter took a bit longer to publish than the last ones. It's longer, but that's not the only reason. For those of you in college, you know that right now is finals. I am STRUGGLING with not one but two self paced classes. So, chapter 5 may be a bit delayed. I want nothing more than to sit at home and write all day, but I've got to make A's and B's this semester or I'll be screwed. Thanks ^_^.

•

Chapter 4

The next morning, Lily Evans woke up automatically at the daylight shining onto her face. She threw her robes on purposefully, and quietly walked down to the common room while everyone else was asleep. She had gotten into the habit of waking early for the simple reason of avoiding traffic in the halls.

Upon reaching the common room, she was confused to see that someone had taken up house on one of the couches. _I'll bet Sirius was so tired after detention last night that he just fell asleep right here, _she grinned. _Maybe he needs a rude awakening._ Picking up a pillow from a nearby chair, she quietly crept over behind the sofa, careful not to let the occupant see her. She swung the pillow high above her head and brought it down on the person on the couch with a wump.

The figure gave a loud shriek and bolted upright. Lily screeched herself and fell onto her backside, looking up to see that the person she had pelted wasn't Sirius at all.

"Severus!" she yelped, scurrying back along the floor.

The boy stared at her wide-eyed, panting with fright. Lily quickly jumped to her feet and dashed to his side.

"Oh my gosh, Severus! What are you doing here? Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry! I didn't know it was you, I thought it was him! Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry!" she said hysterically. 

Severus sat panting for a moment more, and then fell back onto the cushions. Lily guardedly leaned over the back of the couch to see that he was staring at the ceiling, slowly calming.

"I'm so sorry, Severus, I didn't know it was you..." she apologized again, taking his hand in hers. She watched the boy lying there, and then scrunched her eyebrows.

"Hey, what are you doing here anyway? How did you get in?" she questioned.

Severus glanced confusedly at the hand that was holding his, and shrugged.

"Black forced me. You see, my belongings were–" he began, but found that his throat was very dry. He gestured to the trunk at the end of the couch. Looking down at the trunk, Lily stood and went to open it. Upon seeing the contents, she slammed the lid shut and sighed, looking at her hands.

"Oh, Severus, I'm sorry. I guess we should have taken your things when we found you yesterday." She paused. "Did you say that _Sirius_ brought you here?"

Severus scowled. "Yes, but I didn't come voluntarily. He took my trunk."

Lily felt a wave of affection for Sirius wash over her. _How perfectly wonderful of him,_ she thought.

"Well, you best be getting up now," she said, releasing his hand. "Wouldn't want James and them to see you down here. Why don't you come have breakfast with me?"

•

Thirty minutes later, they were sitting together at the Gryffindor table. The bright morning sun blazed through the many windows, and the few students that were already at breakfast were chatting animatedly. A handful of Lily's stray friends had returned, once they saw that Severus was likely to become a permanent fixture. Lily's friend Molly turned to Severus with an appraising look from across the table.

"So…you're back then," she said coolly. Severus looked back at her just as coolly.

"Apparently."

"Well…" Molly smiled slyly and passed him a plate of eggs. "Any _friend_ of Lily's is a _friend_ of mine," she said with a wink. "Ouch!" she gasped suddenly. "Who kicked me?"

Surprised, Severus glanced back to see that Lily was gripping the edge of the table and glaring at the other girl intensely. He shook his head dismissively and started on the plate of eggs.

•

A few hours later, Severus was busily working in the dark dungeons on his latest potions project. The dungeons had been turned into a sort of makeshift study room, as all the other areas of the school were packed with studying students. The sleepy potions professor sat nodding at her desk, her glasses hanging off of her face. All around him, other students were fumbling with their own assignments.

Severus had always been good at potions. Maybe it was his innate methodical nature, but understanding chemicals and measurements had been almost a game for him since childhood. As he was adding various ingredients to his cauldron, his eyes wandered idly down to the floor. The previous evening came creeping back to him.

_It really wasn't all that unpleasant,_ he mused. _At least Black was civil…he didn't mention rescuing me; not once. _ His thoughts drifted to Lily, and he mentally kicked himself.

_She was only trying to help me, and I snapped at her. Again. Maybe I just need to work on not needing so much help. Though she was acting queerly at breakfast. _He remembered catching her giving him a strange look over the waffles. She had seemed almost…like she hadn't had enough sleep.

_"Are you tired, Lily?"_ he had asked her. Lily seemed to snap back to reality.

_"Of course not, Severus! I'm fine,"_ she had said, clearly flustered.

As Severus worked and thought about recent events, he became increasingly aware of a quiet sniggering from behind his desk. He felt a rough thump on his shoulder, and turned to stare into the visage of young Lucius Malfoy. The boy's long, platinum blond hair, longer than Severus's, shimmered as shook his head with a sneer.

"Hullo there, Snape," he said silkily. Instantly, Severus's thoughts were jerked back to the night before last…the numb blows, the cruel voice in the darkness. 

That voice.

His face twisted into an enraged glare. Malfoy simply smirked at him, and glanced back to his friends.

"It's lovely to see you up and about," he said with a plastic smile. "Though it's a shame that it wasn't a result of your own efforts. How…disgraceful," he said as if the word tasted delicious. Two of the rather large boys at his side jiggled with suppressed laughter.

Severus turned back to his cauldron, trying to control his building anger. He knew that McGonagall would definitely contact her father if there were any more slip-ups.

_3 grams of witchhazel…stir for 5 minutes…bring to a simmer…_

Malfoy leaned forward over Snape's shoulder. 

"You're lucky that your little pet Mudblood was there to save you. Maybe next time you won't be so lucky," he whispered. Severus gritted his teeth at the disgusting feeling of Malfoy's breath on his neck. _How did they know?!_

He could hear a smirk on Lucius's voice. "Not as much fun as you were before, Snape." That was the last that Severus heard from the other boy, as the gong that sounded the end of class rang out. He packed his things into his bag and left hurriedly, with no clear destination in mind.

•

Sirius was strolling along the corridor whistling. It was lunchtime, but he wasn't going to the Great Hall today. He had a sandwich in his pack and was headed towards the Gryffindor common room to study. He had been studying all morning in the Great Hall, but found that the noise distracted him. A blushing girl must have come up to talk to him about every five minutes. He figured that it had to be a bit calmer in the common room. He was turning the corner to the hall where the portrait hole was when he heard swiftly falling footsteps down the hall ahead of him. He squinted to see Snape stomp past some seventh-year boys and accidentally knock against one of them.

"Hey! Watch it!" snapped the seventh-year, but Snape didn't seem to hear and kept walking till he was out of sight. Sirius laughed to himself and walked on to the common room.

"Anybody know the magical properties of Devil's Snare?"

"Oy, Molly! Come 'ere and show me how to do that wrist flick thing."

"Watch out there, Finnigan! That stuff's flammable!"

Sirius groaned with disappointment. The room was crawling with students. They were piled all around the study table, and some sat on the floor, trying to glimpse the notes of others. All were scribbling madly on pieces of parchment. Some were holding scales, while others were frantically waving their wands over teapots and matchboxes. A boy that Sirius recognized as Robert Finnigan was tapping his wand on a vial of something that glowed a violent shade of magenta.

With a swell of fear, Sirius saw that a few boys were attempting to budge the large silver trunk at the end of the couch. _If they see what's in that trunk, they'll know Snape stayed here! _He quickly made his way towards them, trying not to trip over his many classmates on the floor. Suddenly, Peter was standing in front of him looking hopeful.

"Sirius!" he squeaked. "I hoped I'd see you. I can't find James or Remus. Can you help me with my dueling stance?" The small blond boy clasped his hands together expectantly.

Sirius leaned around Peter, and was horrified to see that the two boys had given up on trying to move the trunk and were reaching around to open it.

"No!" he shouted, reaching for the trunk. "I mean, yes, Peter. I'll help you later!" he yelped as he jumped the distance to the end of the couch. One of the boys had started lifting the lid, and Sirius dashed next to him and slammed it shut.

"That's mine!" he snapped, a little more edge in his voice than he had intended.

The boys pulled back in surprise. "Gee, Sirius. There's no need to get cross," said the redheaded boy. Sirius suddenly looked embarrassed.

"Sorry, Artie. I didn't mean to yell. Here, I'll move the trunk."

With a wave of his wand, the trunk immediately rose off the carpet and followed Sirius as he walked back towards the boy's dorm. _Maybe I can find a little bit of privacy up there._

He climbed up the stairs and let the trunk fall with a thud to the floor next to his wardrobe. Settling on top of the covers, he pulled out his Potions notes and began to read. 

After a few minutes of study, he glanced up at the silver trunk a few feet away from him. _I wonder what Snape's got in there that's so important. He could have just _bought_ new robes. He'll probably have to, what with the shape his old ones are in._ _Gods, _he thought, kicking himself._ I've _got_ to study! _Sirius pulled his notes back up in front of his face and tried to concentrate. He sighed into the paper and peaked over the top to see the trunk sitting there ominously. 

_Maybe I'll just take one little peek, _he though, setting the papers aside. _Snape won't come back in here with everyone in the common room anyways._ He crept over to the trunk, and glancing around the room to make sure it was deserted, slowly opened the lid. Lying on top of the mess inside were the two halves of the record that Snape was holding last night. Sirius picked the pieces up and fit them together, squinting at the purple label.

"_Opera Classics_," he read with a laugh. "How predictable, Snape."

Looking around the dorm once more, he pulled out his wand. _I just want to see what it sounds like,_ he reasoned with himself. He tapped his wand to the broken record.

_"Reparo," _he whispered. The disc instantly melded itself back together. Setting down the newly mended record, he turned and reached into the trunk again to pull out the mangled green turntable. _This is a little too far gone for_ _Reparo_, he realized. Reaching around to his nightstand, he fished around until he pulled out a book. The cover read "Butch Fixit's Guide to Handyman Hexes." It had been a present from James's parents on his thirteenth birthday, and he hadn't even looked at it for almost two years. He flipped through the pages for a moment, and then found the spell he could use.

Waving his wand, he whispered, "_Rectifus Recordum!"_

The dents slowly bent back out as if someone was pushing them from the inside. Sirius picked up the turntable and inspected it. Satisfied with his repairs, he placed the record on top of the little record player and waited. Nothing happened. Suddenly, a thought occurred to him.

_I hope that Snape put some kind of charm on this to make it work without electricity. I don't have a book for that. _He turned to player around, trying to find out how to make it work. On the front were three knobs. _It's probably the one that says "ON" you moron,_ he said to himself. He switched the knob on, and the instrument spun to life.

A woman's sweet voice began to sing a melancholy tune. It climbed higher, and strings joined in, building up to a mournful peak. The record crackled as the voice sank back down to an almost sobbing tone. It made Sirius imagine dawn…like an execution at dawn. He listened to the track all the way through, and then the next, and then found that he had listened to every song on that side of the record. He seemed to remember himself when the needle scratched its way towards the center of the disc.

He leaned over to reach into the trunk and began systematically pulling out pieces of record and mending them until he had a stack of records sitting by his side. _I just want to see what they are,_ he lied to himself.

Once he had finished fixing all of the records, he put the song of the mournful lady back on and sat back to listen to it. At the angle he was at, he noticed something that he hadn't before. Curiously, he leaned towards the trunk to find that there was a pocket sewn into the lid that obviously contained a rectangular object. He reached to pull it out, but stopped himself. 

It was enough to look at the records…I had already seen them, really. Snape'll probably be furious when he finds out about those. Maybe I ought to stop while I'm ahead… But the temptation was too much. Taking a deep breath, he reached into the pocket and pulled out what looked like a small black journal. Just one look…

He flipped through the pages to find that they were blank. Then he saw that only the first page had writing on it. It was Snape's writing, but very scrawly.

_Sept. 30, 1970_

_Got to school all right. It looks interesting…at least better than home. Met some guys on the train. They were nice. I liked one of them especially. I hope we'll be in the same house._

Then, at the bottom of the page there was another entry, though it was shorter and blurred with what looked like drops of water. _He was crying,_ Sirius realized as he read the sentence. A wave of guilt washed over him.

Oct. 7, '70 

No such luck.

Sirius quickly put the journal back in its place in the lid of the sliver trunk and then carefully laid the stack of records inside it as well. Closing the lid, he pulled out his watch and saw that he only had minutes to get to his Potions exam. He threw his bag over his shoulder and tore down the stairs, through the now empty common room, and out into the hall. As he ran, he remembered the first weeks of his first year at Hogwarts.

It was he who Snape had met on the train, right after he had met his three future best friends. They had been nice to Snape on the trip, but the moment they stepped off the train, it seemed like everything suddenly changed. They were popular, and Snape simply wasn't. A few weeks later, Snape happened to be the accidental victim of one of Sirius's own first pranks. The scrawny little boy had run away sobbing.

_That was the first time I ever saw him cry,_ Sirius thought, but then corrected himself. 

_Also the last._

•

Lily was going crazy. She had only really known him for a few days. Why couldn't she get his face out of her head? _It's his eyes,_ she concluded. _Those black eyes. They seem like they go on forever. _All through her potions exam, she had sat and stared blankly at the questions. 

# 32. How much water should go into a Delectus Draught? 

Severus… 

_# 58. What is the direction most potions should be stirred?_

Severus… 

Before she could stop herself, she had doodled odd little hook-nosed smiley faces all over her parchment. He was sitting just a few seats away from her, and every few minutes he would seem to force himself out of the hunched position he kept moving into. She was so sure he felt the same way. Hadn't he looked at her in _that way_ during breakfast? And he let her hold his hand on several occasions. Didn't that mean something?

_I'll tell him,_ she decided. _Soon._

_•_

Sirius had volumes to think about when he arrived at Filch's office for detention that evening. He wanted to talk to Snape about what he had found, but he couldn't let the boy know that he had been sifting through the trunk. 

He pushed his way through the heavy door to Filch's office to find that Severus was already standing in front of the low desk. Filch was crouched over a piece of parchment on the desk in front of him, scratching away with a tattered quill. He looked livid. Sirius approached and stood with his hands in his pockets next to Snape. Filch continued to assault the parchment he was holding with no apparent regard to anything around him.

The boys looked at each other, Sirius making a subtle nod towards Filch, and Severus replying with a bewildered shrug. So they waited. Filch wrote for what seemed an eternity. Every few lines, he seemed to become furious with the material and begin jabbing and scribbling at whatever word he had just written.

At last, the crusty man stood and, muttering what sounded very much like cursing, stalked out of the room. Sirius turned to follow, taking care to stay back at least ten feet. Behind him, he could hear the efficient steps of Snape. After just a few minutes of quick walking, they arrived at what Sirius recognized as his own Transfiguration classroom. Filch pulled out a ring of at least fifty keys, and picking through them, selected one and jammed it roughly into the lock.

The light door swung open and Filch staggered through, pulling a candlestick from a desk right inside the doorframe. Lighting it with a match, he shoved it into Sirius's hands, along with a ball of crumpled up parchment. Filch turned on his heel and stalked back out of the room, slamming the door behind him. The boys heard a click, and Sirius realized that it was the lock.

"Well, how do you like that," he said indignantly, putting his hands on his hips. "He locked us in!"

Frowning, Sirius walked over to the closest desk. The room was unlit, save the single candle, and its orange light cast eerie shadows over the many displays on the walls. Severus walked over to McGonagall's desk to pick up an old-fashioned hurricane lantern and brought it back to the table that Sirius was at.

Sirius saw the lantern and a faint smile crossed his face. "That's brilliant, Snape. Here, use that paper over there to light it." He suddenly remembered the sweaty wad of parchment that he still held. Slowly he flattened it out on the table, careful not to tear it. It was the piece of parchment that Filch had been so angry at before. The scrawly, scratchy hand was written across the paper at an angle.

_Write the following sentence as many times as possible during the allotted time:_

I am a ruddy brat and I will learn to control myself.

Sirius smirked to himself. Sounds McGonagall inspired, he thought. There were two enormous blackboards at the front of the classroom, though McGonagall seldom used them. Sirius picked up the single candlestick and walked over to the desk, followed by Severus with the now-lit hurricane lantern.

"We've got to write this over and over for the whole time," he frowned, handing the note to Snape. Upon reading the note, Snape was scowling as well.

So much for him being in a talkative mood, thought Sirius. Sighing, he picked up a piece of chalk and, holding the candle up for light, he began to write the sentence at the top of one of the blackboards. I…am…a…ruddy… Snape followed suit, and soon they had covered half the boards.

How can I get him to talk about it? How should I begin? Sirius mused as the chalk squeaked across the board. It turned out, after an unbearably long time, that he wouldn't have to start the conversation. Snape didn't even turn away from his own board as he coldly stated a question.

"Why were you watching me last night?"

Sirius felt his stomach drop. Oh crap. Think quick. "Uh…" Snape turned to look at him with an expressionless face. This gesture seemed to give Sirius the inspiration to put on an angry voice.

"What are you talking about? I'd rather eat dung than watch you sleep!"

Snape surveyed him for a moment. Sirius felt his ears burning and was suddenly thankful for the bad lighting in the room. He turned back to the board with a slightly shaking hand and tried to act like that was the end of it. After a minute, he heard Snape start writing again as well.

"It must have been a nightmare," Snape said, with what Sirius could have sworn was a hint of amusement. Snape turned from the board and walked over to the lantern. He twisted the little knob on its side and the lantern brightened.

"Although, I never said anything about you watching me sleep."

Sirius's eyes widened as he realized his mistake. There went that plan. He frantically thought over ways to escape. The windows. If I got a running start, maybe I could leap over the windowsill. Then he remembered they were on the sixth floor. I could pick the lock! But that would take too long…

He became increasingly aware of a strange sound coming from the other board. It sounded like a fly buzzing. Turning, he saw that Snape's face was twisted into what seemed to be a barely controlled smile. The buzzing sound was actually high-pitched sniggering. He's laughing at me. 

The idea of being laughed at by Snape made Sirius bristle with anger. But it was more than that. He felt…hurt. As if every snicker felt like Snape was ramming a stake right into his gut. He clutched his chalk and scraped it along the board with renewed conviction, but the sniggering didn't stop. Sirius whirled around and glared at Snape.

"You think that's funny, do you?" he fumed. "Well, how'd you get those scars on your neck?" 

Snape stopped laughing. In fact, he suddenly looked very much like he had been punched in the stomach.

"W…what?" he stuttered, his hand drifting up to his neck involuntarily.

"Yeah," shouted Sirius before he could stop himself, his fury fueled by Snape's panic. "What happened? You try to kill yourself or something? Wrong side of your greasy neck for that, mate!"

Snape's eyes widened with shock and he staggered backwards, barely catching himself from falling. His mouth gaped open and he seemed unable to form words.

Sirius watched this reaction with a swell of dread and guilt. "Snape…Snape, I'm sorry. I didn't mean that…" He took a step towards the frantic boy. Looking around himself, he spotted McGonagall's chair and rolled it away from the desk.

"Here, sit down-" he began, turning back towards the other teen just in time to see a pale blur in front of his face. Then there was black nothing.

•

Severus had staggered with enraged disbelief after hearing Black shout out his darkest secret. The boy had immediately looked regretful, but it was too late for that. Much too late. Black had pulled out McGonagall's chair, and in that fleeting instant that he wasn't paying attention, Severus lost his last shred of control. He drew back his fist and released it with all his might. It connected solidly with Black's jaw and sent him flying backwards to tumble into a sprawled heap a few feet away. Snape stood panting with his fists clenched, ready to fight. The fallen boy didn't move.

Oh no…

He dropped down next to Black and pressed two fingers to his throat to find that there was indeed still a pulse beating there. Severus sat back on his heels for a moment, surveying the image in front of him with the utmost astonishment.

I knocked out Sirius Black. Oh my god. Knocked out cold. Right there in front of me.

He was suddenly overtaken with panic. Filch would probably be coming back soon. He reached down and fished around in Sirius's pocket and pulled out the pocket watch. Only thirty minutes left! 

He whirled around frantically, searching for any ideas on how to wake the boy. If he had been in the dungeons, he would have known exactly where to find some smelling salts. He wasn't any good at medical charms either. His eyes fell to a cup of pens on McGonagall's desk and he suddenly had an idea. Grabbing the cup, he screwed up his eyes, trying to remember the incantation. He tapped his wand to the cup.

"Verto Agua!" he yelled, and the cup slowly melded into a bucket of water, which he promptly dumped onto Black's head.

Black gasped and bolted up immediately, and sat there, dripping and panting. He glared up at Severus, bringing a hand to his aching jaw.

"I guess I deserved that. Can't believe I blacked out…"

"Neither can I," Severus said a bit breathlessly, relieved that the water had worked. "You must get up! If Filch comes back here and finds that we haven't finished, McGonagall'll write our parents."

Sirius looked up at him with an annoyed expression. "It doesn't make any difference to me. My parents already think that I'm a no-good cretin. One more owl to them won't really matter."

Severus felt his stomach hit the floor. "Black…please. My parents cannot be contacted."

Black gaped at Severus, obviously shocked at the spectacle of a begging Snape. He turned to look at his lap for a moment, thinking. He gazed back up to Severus with what looked like a foreboding expression.

"I'll help you on one condition Snape," he said very seriously. 

Oh no…here it comes, thought Severus.

Suddenly, Black's face broke into a wincing smile. "You've got to forgive me for what I said. That was way over the line."

Severus stared back at him in disbelief. Black merely grinned. Severus sighed and shook his head, hesitantly offering Black an outstretched hand.

"Thanks," said Black amiably, struggling to his feet. He rubbed his jaw and shifted it from side to side. "Gods, you really socked me there."

"You had it coming to you," Severus said and paused. "You had been watching me."

"I had just come down to see if you were still there!" Black explained, picking up his chalk and quickly scrawling on the board.

They didn't talk for the rest for the rest of the thirty minutes, they just wrote largely to fill the chalkboards with text. When Filch arrived, he glanced at the boards and grunted something the boys took as permission to leave. They collected their satchels and left as quickly as possible.

They strode down the hall side by side and arrived at the Gryffindor common room in no time. Sirius went in first, putting his finger to his lips to tell Snape to be quiet. They walked into the room and Sirius looked around and didn't see anyone.

"Where's my trunk?" Snape said suddenly.

Sirius's mind was a blank for a moment before he remembered the afternoon's events. "Oh, it's up in the dorm." Snape looked at him wide-eyed. 

"There were a slew of kids in here earlier," Sirius quickly explained. "I didn't want them to open it, so I put it up next to my bed. Stay here…I'll go get it." Sirius turned to walk towards the boy's staircase, but stopped dead cold.

"Hello Sirius," said Remus from the bottom stair. He looked as if he had just woken up, wearing plaid pajama pants and a t-shirt. Sirius glanced quickly back at Snape who was also staring at the staircase, and then spun back around to face his friend.

"Remus…I-"

"This is a shock, Sirius," Remus looked sternly at him as he crossed his arms across his chest. "Have you been letting him sleep on the sofa?"

Sirius was at a loss for words. He'd blown it. Remus often ignored his prefect status when it came to his best friends, but Sirius had a feeling that this was the last straw. Now Snape was going to have to go back to his own dorm and possibly get beaten to a bloody pulp. Again.

Remus took a few steps toward his best friend, his brown wavy hair looking very disheveled. Sirius prepared himself for the worst. Remus gazed at him for a moment, and then his face split into a grin. "Why didn't you offer him a bed?"

Sirius nearly collapsed with relief. "Gods, Remus you scared me there for a second. I thought you were gonna tell McGonagall." He paused. "I dunno why; I didn't think there was anywhere to put him. I mean, nobody can find out. The rest of the house wouldn't like it."

"Oh, I don't think it would be a problem," Remus said thoughtfully. "Come on Severus." He turned and walked back up the stairs.

Sirius turned to Snape, who looked like he was seriously considering bolting for the door. Sirius gestured towards him reassuringly.

"It's alright. Come on."

Snape looked genuinely frightened, but hesitantly followed. They crept up the spiral stairs together passing doorway after doorway, behind which slept Gryffindors who would be furious if they saw Snape in their dormitory. They climbed to the top of Gryffindor Tower, stopping at a door that Sirius had never noticed before. Remus silenced the hinges before opening it.

" Only the prefects and professors know about the tower attics," whispered Remus. "We keep all of the extra furniture up here."

Remus gave them a grin and motioned for them to go in before him. They stepped carefully along the hardwood floor. Sirius worried that the floor might creak, and cast a troubled look at Remus, who smiled and mouthed the words "Silencing Charm."

They made their way through the darkened room past old desks and chairs, finally coming upon an empty bed. 

"Lumos," said Remus, holding his now glowing wand, glancing at the dirty bed. He pointed his wand toward the four-poster, whispered, "Scourgify," and as he did, the dust vanished into air, leaving the bed much cleaner than before. Remus motioned for the boys to climb into the bed. Snape did so, sitting stiffly at the end of the mattress, crossing his arms over his chest. Sirius scrambled in awkwardly, making sure to take the opposite end while Remus followed, closing the curtains behind him.

"You can talk in here. I've put a Silencing Charm on the curtains. Just close them after I go"

"Well, this is grand, Moony," Sirius smiled. "Did you pick those charms up while studying for tomorrow's exam?"

Remus rolled his eyes. "Unlike you, I tend to retain what I learn in class."

Sirius glanced around the interior of the four-poster, and suddenly remembered that there was a Slytherin sitting there with them.

"Uh, Remus…how's he gonna come and go?"

Remus looked uneasy. "Well, I haven't exactly gotten to that bit yet. Don't worry though. I'll think of something. Severus?"

Snape snapped his head around, apparently very surprised at being addressed this way.

"You're in the habit of getting up early aren't you?" Remus asked gently. 

Snape nodded. "How did you know?"

Remus gave a good-natured shrug. "I've seen you sneaking over to the baths in the wee hours of the morning." He pulled his legs out from underneath him and reached for the curtains. "Well, as long as you wake up with me, this shouldn't be any problem. You can use the prefect's baths. Prefects always sleep in…except for me," he said with a wink and slipped back out into the darkness.

Sirius sat uncomfortably for a moment, aware of Snape's eyes on him.

"Well…" he began, searching for something to say. "Uh…you'll be ok here?"

Snape gave a slight nod. Sirius sighed with exhaustion. "All right. Good night." He leaned toward the curtains to leave, but stopped.

"I am sorry for what I said," he whispered into the hangings. He heard Snape draw in a short breath.

"Thank you," said the scrawny boy with a pause. "Goodnight, Black."

Sirius smiled to himself. "Goodnight, Snape," he said, and climbed past the curtains, drawing them closed behind him.

Severus relaxed as he saw Black leave. The bed was now completely dark so he pulled out his wand.

"Lumos," he whispered, even though he knew no one could hear him. His wand glowed dimly as he noticed that there was a set of pajamas lying on the pillow. 

Damn them, he thought, tugging his vest off his shoulders. He undid the first few buttons of his cream colored shirt and pulled it up over his head, his glossy hair falling through the collar and settling down his bare back. A moment later, he had on the pajamas that smelled vaguely of dog and crawled under the bright gold comforter.

_He tentatively reached a hand up to finger the scars dotting his nape but pulled away again. _"Wrong side of your greasy neck…"_ he remembered Black shouting at him. He wrapped the comforter around his shoulders tightly and closed his eyes, not really knowing how or what to feel anymore._


	5. Truce

Chapter 5  
  
A skinny little boy was walking through a bright, golden clearing. The setting sun lit up every blade of grass like drops of water in the ocean. The boy closed his eyes and smiled up at the sun, opened his arms wide, in what was then a characteristic gesture, and fell back onto the soft grass. He lay soaking in the warmth and squinted toward the glinting light; his short black hair falling away from his forehead. Turning to the side, he saw a line of ants marching through a gap in the grasses. He propped himself up on an elbow and watched their progress in wonder.  
  
Suddenly, movement! He sat up carefully, scanning the area around him until he saw the small brown mass in the distance. He got to his scuffed knees and parted the grass to have a better look. Yes, it was exactly what he had thought. He began to crawl slowly along the ground, the grass smoothly swishing past his skin.  
  
The brown blur began to take shape as he approached it. Two long, slender ears interrupted the never-ending waves of thin blades, twitching and turning for the slightest sound.  
  
When the boy felt that he could go no closer without being noticed, he gathered his legs underneath him and crouched, focused on the two dainty ears not ten feet from him.  
  
He sprang! The ears instantly spun around and raced in the opposite direction. He galloped after them, bringing his knees up high to avoid tripping through the grass. The rabbit was outrunning him slightly, but he could still see it not fifteen feet away, veering madly. They raced across the clearing and down the hill that the boy knew so well to the edge trees. The grasses had faded away to soft, leaf covered ground that had settled flat from a recent rain. The boy knew that the stream was approaching, and abruptly the racing rodent had stopped at the bank. He stood just a few paces from it, and its glittering eyes that were widened with fear met his own black eyes.  
  
"I won't hurt you, little fellow," he cooed in his youthful voice, inching closer. Small beams of light fell through chinks in the foliage, making the ripples in the stream sparkle like jewels. The little rabbit twitched its nose and shot down a thin log leaning across the waters.  
  
He knew when he was beat. There was no following it now. Sighing good-naturedly, he pulled his expensive, brown leather shoes off along with his socks and sat on the edge of the stream. The water splashed pleasantly, cool between his toes. He hastily rolled his slacks up to mid-thigh, revealing olive skin that had been tanned from weeks of romping under the summer sun. He grinned as he slid down the short bank and into the lapping water. It came up to his knees, but then no further. The water was clear like glass and looking down, he could see the smooth river stones. They felt slimy beneath his soles as he teetered his way across the stream, his shoes and socks gripped tightly in one hand.  
  
He scrambled up the opposite bank and flopped down onto the dry leaves. He decided to let his feet dry in the warm air before putting his shoes back on, which made him notice that the air was becoming cooler. Glancing up at the sun to see that it had sunken far lower than he had expected, he leapt to his feet and sprinted off into the woods.  
  
Minutes later he reached the break in the trees, panting and looked back at the sun long enough to know that it was very late. Over one more hill, and he could see the gray stone of the manor in the distance. There were already orange glows coming from a few of the many windows and his stomach sank.  
  
Then he heard it. It was very faint, but he knew that he heard it. It rode the chilly wind up the hill to meet him, causing his stomach to sink even lower with dread. His pace slowed, as if his feet were willing him to turn away from the orange lights, but he knew that he had to trudge on or it would be even worse.  
  
The sky was clouding over as he neared the end of the mall. Normally green trees surrounding the estate had turned to black silhouettes against the skyline. The smell of an impending storm filled the air; the smell of earth and rain and electricity. Now the sound was unmistakable. Nasal notes flowed from the windows of the bottom floor of the house with growing volume.   
  
The comforting grass under his feet came to an end much too soon. At the front steps, he sat and slipped on his shoes and socks silently, though the abrasive music blasted through ever crack in the house. He stood and slowly reached for the doorknob as if it might bite him, and pushed the door open with a creak.  
  
Scottish bagpipes blared through the entrance, throbbing in his ears. He cautiously stepped over the threshold, darting his eyes from side to side. In the empty lounge at the front of the house, the enchanted record player spun with ferocity. Seeing no one, he tiptoed through the entrance hall and towards the great curved staircase in the middle of the dark room. The sounds bounced off the high, ornate ceiling of the hall in an eerie fashion as he carefully climbed each step.  
  
Dreading the possibility of confrontation, the boy reached the landing and walked swiftly past other doors to his own bedroom. The room was dark as he pushed through the door and closed and locked it behind him. He realized he was panting as he fumbled in the dim light for his candlestick and matches on the table next to the entrance. Hands shaking, he tried to light the first match and the box slipped from his fingers. He dropped to his feet frantically, but stopped himself.  
  
He took a deep, calming breath and began to feel around in the blackness for the matches. In the new silence, he heard a sound that made him freeze. Cold tingles ran up his neck and covered his scalp.  
  
A low, raspy wheezing was coming from the other side of the room.   
  
Miraculously, his fingertips found the matchbox and he madly struck another match and bent to light the candle. The light cast up onto his cheekbones as he swallowed and turned to face the wheezing. His eyes snapped open in shock.  
  
"Mother!" he gasped and rushed to the jumbled heap of emerald skirts and robes lying on the floor behind his bed. He lifted her head from the floor as if it was a bird's egg and, supporting her back, brought the figure up to his chest.  
  
"Don't worry Mother, I'm here," he panted. He looked anxiously from her face to the bed, weighing whether he could lift her or not. He decided she was too heavy; he was tall for his age but possessed almost no muscle. He gently laid her crumpled form down on the floor again, and started to stand when he looked to his hands and gasped.  
  
They were covered in blood.  
  
"Oh my god..." he whispered, slowly backing away. His back hit something solid and warm and he snapped around. In the dim candlelight he made out the tall form of a man standing behind him.  
  
"Father? Oh Father, help me! It's Mother! She's hurt," he gasped, turning to point to the woman on the floor. Suddenly, he heard a murmur and felt his arms snap to his sides. Rough hands grabbed him around his middle and threw him down onto the bed. He managed to turn his head to see the man raising his wand.  
  
"Father? Stop! Let me go! We've got to help Mother!" he yelled, struggling against the spell that was binding his limbs. The man advanced towards him and he suddenly felt cold fear seeping into his chest. The candle had gone out, and the end of the wand began to glow orange and slowly turned white.  
  
"Father...please..." he whimpered pitifully. The white-hot light drew closer and closer to his face and he turned his eyes away from it and gritted his teeth.  
  
Searing, unbearable pain erupted on his neck! He screeched into the mattress underneath his face, and was just about to turn when the pain hit him again. This time, it didn't just touch his delicate skin, but felt as if it was being driven through to his very spine. Just when he thought he would pass out from the excruciating burn, it pulled away, leaving him sobbing into the fabric of his quilt.  
  
As if the sensation was far away, he felt his pants being violently ripped from his legs.  
  
"No-...why--..." he sobbed. Without warning, the white-hot wand jammed back into his neck and he screamed until he couldn't breath. His cries mingled with the bagpipes still emanating from the room below. A new kind of pain began to wrack its way through his body as he lost the last sliver of thought and his mind succumbed to the darkness.  
  
"No!" Severus yelped and snapped up. His eyes raced around his surroundings and his hands clutched the damp sheets. Sweat and hair clung to his face and neck.   
  
Where am I?!   
  
The previous night came back to him in a rush: detention, Black, the bed in the attic. He sat with gritted teeth for a moment longer, and then succumbed to the shuddering sobs that had been aching at his throat.   
  
Slowly, he lowered his head back to the pillows, sob after sob wrenching through his lips. Clutching the back of his neck, he desperately tried to grasp what he had been dreaming about. As always, the pain was still there but the memory had vanished into the night. This is why he had been so angry with Black for asking how he received the scars:  
  
He couldn't remember.  
  
¥  
  
Severus woke early the next morning to a sharp rapping on his bed frame.  
  
"Severus? Are you awake?" came the whisper. Severus squinted his eyes at the red hangings. Golden light twinkled through their fibers like...grasses?  
  
He shook his head and sat up. "I'm awake."  
  
There was a pause. "Severus, if you're saying something, you'll have to pull back the curtains, remember?"  
  
He sighed impatiently and tugged the curtain back. The light momentarily blinded him, and he could then make out the form of a boy holding a towel.  
  
"Black?" he said, rubbing his eyes.  
  
Remus chuckled. "I'm afraid not. I'm your friendly morning wake-up call." He grinned. "Come on. We'd better hurry if we want to avoid traffic."  
  
Severus saw out of the corner of his eye that his trunk was sitting next to the bed. He slipped his feet out from under the covers and down onto the icy floor. As he opened the trunk, he didn't even notice that the hinges were both functional. His eyes widened when he picked out a perfectly round, unbroken record. Looking further into the trunk, he saw that there was a stack of them, good as new. He turned to Remus with a confused expression.  
  
"How did these...did you-" he began. Remus looked equally confused. "Did you go through my things?"  
  
Remus replied with a bemused smile. "I haven't touched it, mate. I just brought the thing up here. Why?"  
  
Severus looked back to the perfect record in his hands. "These were...all broken."  
  
Remus walked over and gently took the record. He turned it over a few times. "Well, they don't seem to be broken anymore, do they?" He squinted at the label. "Ah!"  
  
Severus started. "What? Do you know how it happened?"  
  
Remus grinned down at the disc. "No, but I love this album. You've got good taste," he said, handing back the record to a scowling Severus.  
  
"Hurry now," Remus said again. "The prefects may sleep in, but not 'til noon."   
  
Severus gingerly stood and followed Remus quietly to the door of the attic.  
  
"Come to think of it, though," Remus whispered as they reached the common room, "Sirius always has been a crackerjack repair charmer."  
  
¥  
  
Sirius finished his third O.W.L. with relative ease. Transfiguration, though it generally didn't show in his grades, was one of his best subjects. Instead of leaving the Great Hall immediately after the exam, he picked up his bag and leaned against one of the archways, waiting for the long tables to reappear for lunch.  
  
McGonagall walked to the center of the room and surveyed it. Satisfied that there were no students left at the desks, she walked to one of the archways and turned back to face the enourmous room. She withdrew her wand from her robes and with a quick jab, the hundreds of desks began to rattle and move across the floor. They butt up against one another into the shape of four lines, and for a moment, Sirius thought that they would simply pile up. With a loud crack the desks instantly melted together. Only then did Sirius realize that the finish on the desks had been the same as the house tables.  
  
No matter how long I am at this school, it always finds new ways to amaze me, he thought with a smile. Chattering students began pouring in and taking seats at the newly formed tables. Sirius walked over to the Gryffindor table and sat, throwing his bag underneath his seat. Remus emerged from the arches and Sirius greeted him with a wave. Upon reaching the table, Remus swung his leg over the seat next to Sirius.  
  
"How did our friend fare this morning?" Sirius said quietly. Remus began pulling sandwiches from a platter in the middle of the table and gave the other boy a sly grin.  
  
"Oh, fine," he said. "No problems. It was actually kind of funny. He thought that I was going to get in the big bath too. Turned bright red, he did."  
  
Sirius felt a sudden flash of anger. He confusedly pushed it back down, but eyed Remus suspiciously. "And you didn't, right?"  
  
Remus snorted into his milk. "No," he said, rolling his eyes. "You know I don't like baths. Showers are much better... Why?"  
  
Sirius shrugged and bit into a turkey and salami sandwich. Remus glanced briefly around them and leaned closer.  
  
"He was a bit confused this morning about his trunk, though. Apparently somebody had been...messing with it. Any idea who that could have been?" he asked, smiling mischievously.  
  
Sirius faltered for a moment, then continued eating his sandwich. "I have no idea what you're talking about."  
  
Hands clapped down on both their shoulders and they jumped. "Hey fellas! What's for lunch?" James hopped into the seat on the other side of Sirius and began piling his plate with food.  
  
"By Jove! Salami! My favorite!" he managed to say before stuffing his face. Sirius calmed down and rolled his eyes.  
  
"Everything's your favorite, Prongs."  
  
James didn't seem to hear the comment. "So guys, I was thinking about that new flying technique I was trying, right? Well, I've been going over it in my head, and I decided that it would really work a lot better if I added a twist at the end and gradually turned to..." he began, but Sirius didn't bother to listen to the rest. He loved playing Quidditch, but not talking about it all the time. Instead, his gaze slowly drifted down the table, while trying to nod to James in the right places. His eye caught on a black head that was much higher above others.  
  
Well he looks a bit out of place, he thought with a smile as he saw Snape. I wonder how long he's been eating down there. Snape was sitting, slightly hunched over, in the middle of a group of girls. Squinting, Sirius could see that Lily was sitting at the scrawny boy's side. Now that's a surprise. I guess they're getting on all right then. It explains him sitting at our table...  
  
Snape looked at Lily and gave what could have almost been a small smile. He picked up a sandwich and began taking small bites from it. Sirius raptly watched the way Snape held out his pinkie as he ate the sandwich. The way his shirt bunched at his elbows. The way his hair fell over his collar. The way his hair curved along his jaw...  
  
Sirius shook his head slightly. I was thinking about the scars, that's what it was, he assured himself. Those scars... He was still very curious about the marks, especially after Snape's reaction to the mention of them. He went over the events of the previous evening, cringing at his hasty words, and stopped at the moments after he had been revived.  
  
"Black...please. My parents cannot be contacted." Snape had said. Sirius's breath caught.  
  
Those scars... And when he mentioned his parents, his expression... It was almost like he was- frightened. Yes that's what it was... He was frightened! His eyes widened at the possibilities.   
  
Suddenly the absurdity of the idea hit him. It just couldn't be possible. The Snapes were one of the most esteemed families in England. It simply couldn't be. Someone would have known. Thoughts of his own, highly esteemed, family floated through his mind and he felt a drop of comprehension.  
  
He glanced back again at the scrawny boy who was now sipping out of a flagon. What he had always seen as malicious black eyes suddenly softened before his gaze into something very sad...sad and alone. Somebody would have known...Snape turned and looked over his shoulder, and for one electric moment their eyes met.  
  
"Sirius!" someone yelled in his ear and he started. James was looking at him intently.  
  
"You don't have to shout, Jim," he said, rubbing his ear. James looked at him seriously.  
  
"You weren't answering me." He paused. "Padfoot...are you sure about Lily? I mean about me giving her a try?"  
  
Sirius gave his friend a look of disbelief and sighed. "Jim, I told you already, it's fine. Why won't you just believe me?"  
  
"Then what were you looking at just now?" James said, puzzled. "You looked positively lovesick."  
  
"What? I did not! I was just..." Inspiration hit. "I was just wondering why Snape was sitting down there with her."  
  
James seemed confused for a moment and adjusted his glasses. He leaned back and very noticeably looked down the table to see Lily punching Snape in the shoulder. Sirius suddenly realized that mentioning this information was probably a mistake. James started to get up from his chair.  
  
"Why that greasy-"  
  
"James!" Sirius whispered, grabbing James's arm. "Don't. Remember what happened the last time you bothered with Snape?"  
  
James grudgingly sat back down and folded his arms across his chest. "Why's he over there? I don't want that greasy Slytherin at our table." Sirius frowned.  
  
"I don't know, but he wouldn't be sitting with Lily unless she wanted him to, would he? Just cool it."  
  
He handed James a flagon of pumpkin juice and turned to put his things back into his bag. "Here, drink this. I'm going up to the tower. I'll be right back." He rose and started out of the room.  
  
Severus had been having a pleasant lunch. Lily had found him in the hallways a few hours before and they had gone to take the Transfiguration exam together. She had looped her arm through his, which he had thought was very peculiar behavior. Being so close to the girl had made him feel very tall and awkward, and as they had walked into the Great Hall, he could feel eyes boring into him from all directions. But Lily seemed to enjoy his company, and he decided that he would be a gentleman and not pull his arm away.  
  
Now they were eating lunch and Lily's arm was once again touching his. She must just not realize it, he thought, thoroughly aware of the warm weight against his skinny bicep. She turned to him and gave him what he thought was a warm smile and offered him another sandwich. He unsuccessfully tried to smile back and took the plate from her gently.  
  
"So how do you think you did on the exam, Severus?" she asked.  
  
"Oh, fair I think,' he replied and began to eat his sandwich. He then realized that he should ask her the same. "Do you think you did well?"  
  
Lily scoffed. "Are you kidding? Transfiguration's my worst subject. I've already accepted the fact that I'll do lousy on it. I've just got to ace all my others." Severus smirked and took another bite of sandwich.  
  
"It's hard to believe you're bad at anything," he commented, missing Lily's blush completely. "If you'd like, I can help you out with it." He felt the weight of Lily's arm press even tighter against his own.  
  
"Oh Severus, that would be wonderful!" she said, beaming. Severus was briefly surprised but went back to quietly eating his lunch. He picked up his glass of pumpkin juice and took a sip but felt a strange tingling on his neck. He glanced down the table to see that Black was looking right at him.  
  
"Isn't this cozy?" said a sneering voice behind them. They both turned to see Malfoy and his cronies standing in the aisle.  
  
"Snape and his Mudblood," he said mockingly. The two boys at his side guffawed.  
  
"Well boys, now at least we know where he's been sleeping," he said contemptuously.  
  
Severus was vaguely aware of Lily shouting something and a hand holding him back, but he brushed it away and drew back his fist. Malfoy's smirk melted away as Severus began to swing and imagine knocking out a few of those perfect white teeth.   
  
Suddenly, a hand stronger than Lily's gripped his elbow. He was shocked to see Sirius Black standing between himself and Malfoy.  
  
"Get lost, Malfoy," Black almost growled.  
  
Malfoy looked stunned, but quickly regained his composure. "I was leaving anyways," he smirked, though obviously dubious about the taller teen standing before him. He flipped his platinum hair over his shoulder and stalked off, followed closely by his two thugs.  
  
Sirius swung around, gripped Snape's shoulder and roughly pushed him towards one of the archways. He tightened his grip on the skinnier boy to almost bruising as they stumbled into a dark corridor. Snape wrenched free of his hand and stopped, glaring. Sirius glared right back.  
  
"What the hell are you doing?" Sirius shouted.  
  
"What am I doing?!" Snape snarled in disbelief.  
  
"Yeah, you! Just because I let you take a pot-shot at me, it doesn't mean you can go knocking everyone out!"  
  
"I'll knock out whomever I please, and it's no business of yours!" Snape roared.  
  
"Oh, yes it is! If you get in trouble again they'll tell our parents!"  
  
"You said you didn't care about that!"  
  
"Well you said you did!" Sirius retorted. Snape paused for a moment and seemed to be calming himself.  
  
"You didn't hear what he said. You would have done the same thing," he hissed.  
  
Sirius was taken aback by this subtle comparison and realized he was panting. "You're probably right. But I wouldn't have been lucky enough to have someone there to stop me."  
  
"I could have handled it on my own! I don't need your help!"  
  
Sirius smirked. "Oh, yes. You were doing a simply bang up job. And what were you going to tell McGonagall, huh? 'Sorry professor, but he had it coming to him.' Crabby old professors aren't nearly as forgiving as I am."  
  
Snape's eyes flashed at him. "And what do you care about whether or not my parents are told? You're supposed to hate me!"  
  
"I do hate you!"  
  
"I hate you too!  
  
They stood panting and glaring at each other. Slowly, a smile began to tug at Sirius's mouth. His face broke into a grin and he shook his head. Snape looked positively livid.  
  
"What's so funny?"  
  
"I'm sorry," Sirius said, chuckling. "I'm not laughing at you, I'm laughing at what we just said."  
  
Snape rolled his eyes, but seemed to relax a bit. Sirius stepped towards him and extended a hand.  
  
"Truce?" he asked with a tired smile. Snape hesitated for a long moment before grasping Sirius's hand with his own.  
  
"For now." They shook hands firmly and Sirius looked Snape directly in the eyes. In the dim light, Snape's eyes looked almost purple, and his skin was soft and cool to the touch. Looking down, Sirius realized that their hands had stopped shaking and his stomach fluttered. He quickly pulled away.  
  
"Well," he began, carding his fingers through his hair, "I'll let you get back to lunch."  
  
Snape was looking at his hand with wide eyes, but shoved it hastily into his pocket. "Yes, I... I suppose so."  
  
"I am serious though," Sirius said, cringing at the horrid pun, "You've got to control that temper of yours." They turned and walked back down the corridor and out into the daylight.  
  
¥  
  
Sirius was going to walk back up to the tower, but after the encounter with Snape, he found that he couldn't remember why he had wanted to go there in the first place. So after he was sure that Snape had made it back to his seat, he looped around and headed back to James and Remus.  
  
"Well you sure look happy. D'you win the Galleon Draw or something?" James said into his flagon.  
  
Sirius hadn't realized he was smiling quite so widely and immediately straightened his face as he sat. At that moment, Peter raced up and slid into the next seat.  
  
"Sorry I'm late fellas! Boy, do I have something to tell you!"  
  
Sirius stifled a yawn and tried to look interested. Remus seemed to be honestly paying attention. "Yeah Petey? What is it?"  
  
Peter clutched his fists excitedly. "Well, I had this idea! For a business, like." He leaned in closer.   
  
"I've come across something really special, see? And I'm just positive I'll make a killing with 'em," he whispered. Peter wasn't usually so enthused about any of his own endeavors, so Sirius leaned in, genuinely curious. James simply leaned back and rolled his eyes.  
  
"He told me already. Don't listen to him...you'll just be disappointed," he sighed. Peter huffed and squinted at the bespectacled boy.  
  
"You're just jealous 'cause you didn't think of it first," he squeaked.  
  
James leaned closer and nodded sarcastically. "You're right Pete. It's a brilliant idea. Go ahead and tell them."  
  
Peter didn't seem to notice James's sarcasm as he turned back to Sirius and Remus. "All right, as I was saying, I've found something really important. I'm going to try to sell them around school for at least ten knuts a piece!"  
  
This caught Sirius's attention. "Ten knuts a piece! Merlin, Pete! What are they? How many do you have?"  
  
Peter gave a nervous little smile and gestured for them to gather closer.   
  
"Five...thousand!"  
  
Sirius nearly fell out of his seat. He grabbed Peter's arm. "Peter...mate...are you telling me that you have five thousand of something worth ten knuts each? Why that's almost-"  
  
"Just over one-hundred galleons," Peter beamed. James scoffed and crossed his arms.  
  
"Don't say I didn't warn you," he said, frowning. But Sirius didn't hear, and neither did Remus for that matter. They were imagining all that one hundred galleons could buy.  
  
"All right, Pete. You've got me convinced," Sirius said. "Now, what is it exactly that you have?"  
  
Peter gave a wary look up and down the aisle before pulling his satchel out from under his seat.  
  
"Now, you mustn't tell anyone," he began, clutching the bag to his chest. Sirius and Remus exchanged an excited grin.  
  
"All right...here!" Peter whipped something out of his bag and dumped its contents on the table. Sirius grinned and peered down to see that it was a pile of...  
  
He picked up one of the brown rings, pinched both ends of it and pulled. It stretched. He cast a confused glance up to Peter, who grimaced excitedly and gave a little squeak.  
  
"I say, Peter...Aren't these...ah, rubber bands?"   
  
Peter squeaked again. "Oh, is that what their called? They're wonderful aren't they?"  
  
Sirius gaped at Peter with disbelief before shaking his head again. "Uh...yes! My, they are very...stretchy. Right, Remus?  
  
Remus looked equally dumbfounded, weaving a band around his fingers. "Yes Pete, they're...brilliant. Yes, that's right. Brilliant." He forced a smile.  
  
"Oh, I knew it! And you won't believe how cheap they were!" Peter squealed.  
  
Sirius couldn't hold a smile any longer. "Peter, are you saying you actually bought these?"  
  
Peter's face fell. "Well...yeah. I mean...that's usually how you get things, isn't it?"  
  
Sirius found himself shocked beyond words. "Er...yes! Yes, of course, Peter. How much did you say you wanted for those again?" Sirius asked quickly, digging into his pockets for any change.  
  
"Oh, Sirius, you don't have to buy one! I'll give it to you. After all, there are five thousand." Peter beamed, though he was looking a bit unsure. Sirius began to pull his hands back out of his pockets when Remus pinched his side.  
  
"Of course we'll pay for them, Peter. We want to be your first official customers, don't we Sirius?"  
  
Sirius gaped back at him. "We do?" Remus pinched him again. "I mean, we do! Yes, of course we do! Ten knuts then, Petey?"  
  
Peter shook with excitement. "Yes, that's right! Ten a piece."  
  
Sirius gave Remus a dirty look as they each passed over ten of the little bronze coins. Peter giddily pocketed the money and turned back to his friends.  
  
"All right. Your choice," he said, gesturing grandly towards the huge pile of rubber bands.  
  
Sirius surveyed the pile before picking one right off the top. "Yes," he said, stretching the band. "This one seems particularly...resilient. It's mine."  
  
Remus picked one off the side and gave Peter an earnest grin before pulling it over his wrist. Peter grinned back and began stuffing the bands back into his satchel.  
  
"Well, I'm off then! You two have proven to me that this is indeed a market worth pursuing!" He squeaked once more, swung his bag over his shoulder and scurried off.  
  
Sirius sat staring at the bit of brown rubber that he held between his fingers. Remus snapped his own gently against his wrist.  
  
"Remus, old boy...are you sure that was an entirely wise thing to do?" Remus looked back at him annoyed.  
  
"Well what you have me do, Sirius? Tell him he was off his rocker?"  
  
Sirius rested his face in his hands. "No, but he'll be a bloody laughing stock if he tries to actually sell those to anyone!"  
  
"Well," Remus said thoughtfully, "who knows? Maybe people will buy them..."  
  
James pounded Sirius on the back. "Sure Remus. And Sirius here will kiss Snape full on the lips. It just isn't going to happen." He slowly stood and picked up his own bag. "I'm going down to the pitch to try that Quidditch thing I was talking about earlier. You two want to come with me?"  
  
Sirius cringed at the reference of him and Snape, and then sighed. "Sure Jim. Come on, then, Remus." Sirius slid the rubber band over his wrist and followed the other two boys out of the Hall.  
  
¥  
  
What just happened? Severus wondered as he went back to his own seat at the Gryffindor table. Lily greeted him with a worried smile.  
  
"Well? What did he say?" she asked patiently. Severus sat rigidly on the bench and withdrew his hand from his pocket to give it a brief glance.  
  
"Severus...? Are you all right?"  
  
He shoved his hand back into his pocket again. "Yes, Lily. I'm fine."  
  
Lily gave him an appraising look. "You don't look fine. Merlin, what did he say?"  
  
Severus straightened up and relaxed. "Nothing really. Just told me to watch my temper. He's just scared for himself. If I get into trouble, McGonagall will notify our parents, you know."  
  
"Oh, Severus, you don't really think that's the only reason he's helping you, do you?"  
  
Severus did his best to look incredulous. "And why else would he want to help me?"  
  
"Oh, I don't know," Lily said thoughtfully. "I know that you two have always hated each other, but he seems to be...coming around or something. I think he likes you all right."  
  
"Ha!" Severus scoffed. "Bully for him... I'll just be glad when these detentions are over." Lily picked up her bag and stood uncertainly.  
  
"Severus...could you come with me for a minute? There's something I'd like to show you." Severus absentmindedly rose with his satchel and followed Lily out of the hall. He didn't notice all the amused faces turned to watch them.  
  
They strode down the corridor outside the Great Hall, and after a minute Severus found Lily's hand in his. This action didn't puzzle him anymore; Lily had held his hand so many times before, it had almost begun to comfort him. Over the last few days, Severus had taken an extreme liking to Lily. It could have had something to do with the fact that she didn't hate him like everyone else, of course, but she was also a very nice girl. It was just pleasant to have a friend.  
  
Yes, he mused as they walked, If I could have a sister, I'd want her to be just like Lily.  
  
In truth, he really did want the detentions to end. There was something peculiar happening during those hours that was really a bit frightening. He couldn't even explain it. He thought that he was just imagining things during the first detention. That moment when he had first touched Black's hand...  
  
"Severus?" Lily asked quietly, jerking him out of his thoughts. "We're here."  
  
He suddenly saw that Lily had led him through a great stone doorway into what looked to be the Astronomy tower. The afternoon sun shone across the large, open balcony and glinted off of the empty telescope stands lazily. Lily slowly walked from the entrance where they stood to the short wall around the perimeter of the balcony.  
  
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" she said, folding her arms. Severus walked over to stand next to her. He glanced over the edge to see that they were at least twenty stories off the ground. From this height, he could see almost all of the north side of the Hogwarts grounds. The trees surrounding the land were already turning red and yellow for the fall. There were students lounging on the grass next to the lake and the sun painted everything a rich golden hue. Off to the right was the Quidditch pitch, where Severus could see a few Gryffindors practicing. Lily took Severus's hand again.  
  
"I come up here sometimes," she said softly. "To think and stuff." Her other arm was swinging idly at her side and she was biting her lip.  
  
Strange. She seems...nervous or something.  
  
"There are almost never any people up here during the day. Everyone comes here at night. I don't know why...I think that the night time is seriously overrated."  
  
Severus squinted distractedly out at the scenery. "People come here at night? Other than for classes, you mean?"  
  
Lily gave a little anxious laugh and blushed. "Oh yeah. For, uh...extracurricular activities."  
  
"I see..." Severus said, although he didn't see at all. On the bank of the lake, he could make out Pettigrew standing with a group of younger students, obviously showing them something that they were raptly interested in.  
  
"Hey, isn't that-" he began, turning to Lily. He was suddenly aware of just how close she was. And she was leaning closer. His stomach went cold.  
  
"I really like you, Severus," she said, squeezing his hand. Severus's eyes darted from her hand to her face and he stepped backwards involuntarily.  
  
"Uh...I like you too, Lily," he replied uncertainly. He didn't like where this was leading; not one bit. She gave him a soft smile.  
  
"The way you stood up to Malfoy earlier...or tried to...it was just...great. Wonderful." She reached around and took his other hand as well.  
  
"Guh- um, yes! I mean...I mean, anyone would have done the same, Lily." She was only inches from his face now. She sighed happily.  
  
"Perhaps. But somehow, it meant more coming from you." She was so close that he could see all the little pores on her nose. Even though he took another step back, she was moving even closer. He felt his heels butt against the wall on the lip of the balcony.  
  
"Lily...wh-what are you doing?" he asked a bit frantically. She just smiled again and squeezed both his hands.  
  
"Shh..." she whispered closing the distance between them. Severus braced himself just as her lips brushed his, his eyes wide. But suddenly she wasn't close anymore. His stomach flew into his throat as he realized he was falling backwards, his mouth open in a silent scream.   
  
There was nowhere to go but over the edge of the balcony.  
  
Review. Go to my site. askandrea.com/soliloquy 


	6. Mrs Norris

Chapter 6  
  
"That was pretty good, Prongs! Try the flip-twist thingy again!" Sirius yelled. He was sitting idly on his broomstick thirty feet above the sandy pitch. There was a strong breeze gusting across the grounds, carrying his bellowed instructions away from his mouth like they were scraps of tissue. Remus was lounging on the ground, reading on the soft grass of the sidelines.  
  
"No! James! Not that way!" Sirius roared. "To the left!... Yes! That's good! One more time!"  
  
James pushed his broom into a steep nosedive before veering to shoot back up above the goal hoops. He turned and parked right above the tallest center hoop. Sirius could see him mouthing something, but the sound was lost on the wind.  
  
"What?" Sirius hollered, cupping his hand to his ear. James gave him an exasperated look and then drew a circular shape in the air.  
  
"Oh," Sirius said to himself, pulling his satchel over his shoulder and opening it. He withdrew the quaffle and looked back up to James, who gave an affirmative nod. Sirius drew his arm back and threw the ball as hard as he could toward the goal hoops. That's when he heard the faint scream. He abruptly turned from James and looked back towards the castle. What he saw nearly made him fall off his broom.  
  
Someone was hanging upside-down off the balcony of the Astronomy tower, with only one person holding desperately to his ankles!  
  
He frantically looked around for help, but James was tossing the quaffle like a kitten with a ball of string. He looked down to the ground to see that Remus had evidently heard the scream too, but couldn't see over the stands.  
  
Oh gods... I've got to do something! he realized and zoomed off towards the castle. Squinting into the distance, he could see that the hanging figure was a boy...a boy with black hair. He gripped the handle with renewed fervor, straining, urging his broom to go faster. The wind whipped violently through his robes, chilling his skin and face and slowing his progress.  
  
He could fall any second! he thought hysterically. I have to get closer to the ground! He reached the bank of the lake and zipped along the surface, sheets of water flaring in his wake. He could see a group of students standing on the opposite bank.  
  
"Look out! Get outta the way!" he hollered, flailing his arm. They ducked and dove just in time to feel him zip right over their heads. He was only one hundred yards away now. Seventy-five yards...Fifty yards...  
  
He looked up at the tower to see that the boy was now hanging by only one ankle. It could have had something to do with the boy's robes billowing down over his head, disorienting him and revealing skinny legs and graying shorts underneath.  
  
"Oh god! Snape!" Sirius shrieked before pulling up on his broom with every ounce of strength he had. He shot towards the balcony, aiming carefully for the flailing body hanging above him.  
  
Suddenly, Snape was falling! He was a jumbled mass of tangled robes and legs, plummeting down the side of the tower. Sirius dove, his mind screaming that he would run into the wall, but he ignored it. His heart was beating crazily; he felt adrenaline throb all the way to his fingertips. This is it... he thought, bracing his legs and holding out his arms as best as he could.  
  
With a gut-wrenching wump, Snape crashed into him! The collision knocked the wind out of him and made his eyes darken for a moment before he realized that they were now both falling. Stupid! Quidditch brooms aren't made to carry two! Gritting his teeth against the throbbing pain in his arms, he pulled up on the handle with all his might. It didn't have much affect, and the ground was closing fast.  
  
"Up!" he yelled hysterically. "Up!" He could feel his fingernails digging into his palms, but the broom seemed to be slowing. It was too late! They were going to hit! Sirius squeezed his eyes shut and held onto Snape tightly.  
  
They met the ground with a crash! Snape flew from his arms and Sirius felt his leg curl underneath him with a sickening crunch as he tumbled head over heel along the grass. He finally came to a halt with a thud. Red stars danced in front of his eyes as he clumsily sat up and tried to make the world stop spinning.  
  
"Ugh...Snape. Snape..." he muttered, trying to get up. A spear of hot pain shot through his leg and he yelped. His eyes began to clear and he could make out the mass of black robes about ten feet away from him. It wasn't moving.  
  
"Snape!" he shouted, more coherently. He winced as he pulled his body around and started dragging himself towards the pile. He heaved himself up next the Snape and began unwrapping the robes. He's like a present, he thought stupidly. At last, he found the hood and pulled it gently over Snape's head. The boy's eyes were closed and his mouth was hanging open slightly, the breeze blowing a few strands of hair across his face. Oh gods...  
  
"Snape! Wake up!" he said frantically, gathering the shoulders up in his arms and giving them a little shake. Surprisingly, the black eyes instantly flew open. Snape seemed shocked for a minute, and then his face drew into a look of distaste.  
  
"Black, how is it I have the extreme misfortune of being saved by you again?" he groaned.  
  
Sirius's relieved grin quickly turned sour. "Well! I hoped you be a bit more appreciative, after I, you know, risked my life to save you."  
  
"That word..." Snape said, gritting his teeth. "It seems like all I ever am these days is appreciative!" Sirius gaped at him in angry disbelief.  
  
"But you would have died if I-"  
  
"And I should have! I am indebted to you enough, Black, without you swooping around, plucking me out of the sky!" Snape bellowed. Sirius's disbelief melted into cold anger.  
  
"Fine. The next time you fall off a balcony, I'll let you plummet to your death!"  
  
"And I'll thank you to!" Snape snarled before cringing in frustration.  
  
Sirius just sat in silence for a minute, festering over the words. Why had he rescued the slime-ball in the first place? Why had he stepped into the spat with Malfoy at lunch? Why was he bothering at all? He didn't understand this creature sitting next to him. He saved Snape, and now the boy was biting his head off. Best get it over with. On with the formalities.  
  
"Are you hurt?" he asked, resigned.  
  
"No, I don't think so... Are you?"  
  
"Oh, no. I'm fine," Sirius said, shifting around to stand. The pain shot through his leg again and he gasped. Snape gave him an unimpressed look.  
  
"Oh yes...When I'm fine I cringe in pain too," Snape said coolly. Sirius sat back as gently as he could, but even that small movement made his injured leg twist agonizingly. He grimaced and bit his lip.  
  
"I...I think I might ought to go see Madame Pomphrey," he stuttered. Snape sneered.  
  
"I think that's a good idea," he said sarcastically, but his body abruptly stiffened.  
  
"Snape? What's wrong? Are you- ...oh," he said breathily. He suddenly realized that the hand that he was resting on Snape's knee wasn't touching robes, but was warming against bare, pale skin. Snape cast his eyes down to the unmoving hand and then slowly gazed back at Sirius.  
  
"Black, I-"  
  
"Oh thank god!"  
  
They both jumped away and turned to see Lily running for them. "Oh Merlin, Severus, are you all right?"  
  
"Yes, I'm fine, though it looks like Black's leg might be broken," he said and Sirius winced.  
  
"Oh my gosh, Sirius that was incredible! I saw everything! Are you ok? You were amazing!" she babbled, helping to pull Sirius to his feet. She didn't stop blathering until they had climbed all the way up to the infirmary.  
  
¥  
  
"Lily, I must speak with you," he began seriously. Lily's face glowed with happiness and his stomach ached with guilt at the sight. They were standing behind one of the cloth partitions in the infirmary, holding hands. Lily had instigated the latter. After they had brought in Black, Madame Pomphrey had assured them of his swift recovery. "He'll be out in two shakes," she had said with a scolding glance.  
  
He had absolutely no idea how to tell Lily. How can you tell someone something that even you are not completely sure of? It had just been a vague feeling, lodged in the back of his mind for four years. Or was it five years ago? Or three? Dates had begun to blend together, turning the memories of his life into a bit of a soup. In truth, he had felt the vague feeling ever since he had first ridden the Hogwarts Express. He had been so young; it almost made him laugh to think about it. And cry. He had tried, he really had. He was just never any good at making friends. Maybe it was years of living at a secluded manor, practically alone.  
  
But when he boarded that train and saw all the other children laughing and talking around him, even at eleven years old, he felt it. He couldn't tell what it was back then, but he felt it still, and eventually came to suspect it. Then he came to hate it. And now he was backed into a corner facing a choice between the lesser of two evils:  
  
Tell Lily, face possible school-wide humiliation.  
  
Don't tell Lily, face great personal humiliation and discomfort.  
  
But maybe he wasn't at all. Maybe he was just the same as everyone else, but going through some strange phase. Was he willing to give up, in his opinion, the prettiest witch in school, all for a vague feeling? And now, suddenly, the decision was upon him. Lily was standing in front of him, expectantly knotting a strand of red hair about her fingers. He fretfully pulled his hands away from Lily's to rub the bridge of his hooked nose.  
  
"Severus?" she asked, her happy face falling. "Severus, I'm so sorry for what happened. I don't pretend to assume that after I almost killed you, you'd be willing to...um...be with me. But I was sort of hoping...so I leave the decision entirely up to you."  
  
Oh. Well, that makes everything better, he thought sadly. He drew in a deep breath.  
  
"Lily, I..."  
  
"Wait," she stopped him, putting a finger to his lips. "Severus, I think I know what you're going to say, and I understand." Severus gazed at her helplessly.  
  
"Really, Severus, it's all right," she reiterated, but her eyes said it wasn't all right. In fact, they were glittering with tears. "I'll see you at dinner, ok?" she choked, and turned to walk towards the infirmary doors.  
  
Severus gazed after her pathetically before gritting his teeth.  
  
"Lily! Wait," he called and saw her stop abruptly. I just know I'm going to regret this, he thought as he strode towards her.  
  
"All right," he said, grasping her hands. She gave him a skeptical look.  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
Don't do it... Don't say it... "Yes, I'm sure."  
  
Lily smiled at him softly and squeezed his hands. "All right." And with that, she leaned in on her tiptoes and brushed her red lips against his pale ones. It briefly reminded him of the behavior of magnets when someone tries to push two together their opposite poles. He forced himself to relax this time, and actually, it wasn't that bad. It was very warm. But even so, his heart and his mind were finally in complete agreement over the matter. He felt absolutely nothing, save the cold grip on his heart that said that this was fundamentally wrong.  
  
Lily drew away finally and gave him another smile. He did his best to smile back and let her lead him out of the infirmary. Neither of them had realized that a silhouette of the entire scene had been cast up onto the cloth partition, and a boy with a splint tied to his leg had been watching the whole thing with a crestfallen expression.  
  
¥  
  
What's wrong with me? he thought angrily, gripping his head. Sirius was still laying in the white hospital bed three hours later, his leg almost healed. Pomphrey had bustled around him most of the time, applying cooling spells to his leg.  
  
"No need to look like that, now," she said, mistaking his depressed expression for one of pain. "Here's another cooling spell. Feel better?" He forced a smile and nodded.  
  
"I thought so," she said with a smile, but then went grave. "Mr. Black, these reckless Quidditch practices must stop. I insist that you and Mr. Snape wear proper protective padding while you are teaching him to fly. After you brought him in the other day, I should have said something, and if I have either of you in my infirmary once more, I will consult the head of your houses immediately. Do I make myself clear?" Sirius had the feeling that this was a command rather than a request and nodded meekly.  
  
That had been some quick thinking on Lily's part when they had first brought Snape to the infirmary. At the time, Sirius hadn't really seen the point in lying to Pomphrey about their injuries, but it was proving to be a good excuse for their increasing number of visits.  
  
"Now, just another fifteen minutes or so and you can be on your way. Lay back now."  
  
Sirius did as he was told, but as soon as he was comfortable, the images and sounds of Lily and Snape flooded into his mind. He squeezed his eyes shut, willing them away, but they wouldn't stop. He threw his arms back in frustration.  
  
I don't even fancy Lily! Why do I feel like this? he thought angrily. He glanced back to the cloth barrier that had held the shadows just hours before. He was still in shock over what had played out there before him. He sighed dejectedly. Black, you've really lost it this time. Suck it up.  
  
When the old nurse came back later and removed the dressings, Sirius gave her a winning grin and thank you, and walked confidently out of the infirmary.  
  
¥  
  
The Great Hall was full of hushed whispers at dinner. Candles floated lazily above the tables, lighting the food and faces merrily.  
  
"Did you see them?"  
  
"Yeah, they were walking through the halls, holding hands!"  
  
"That is so disgusting."  
  
"I don't believe it!"  
  
"I saw them out on the grass by the lake. She kissed his cheek!"  
  
"Look! There they are!"  
  
Lily strolled into the Hall leading Severus by the hand. He wished that it were a bit darker in the room so he could crawl under a table and disappear, but he did his best to look cheerful. It came out as a crooked scowl. If he had thought that the first day he had sat with Lily was uncomfortable, it was nothing compared to this. Lily looked back at him and gave his hand a little squeeze as they sat at the usual place towards the end of the Gryffindor table.  
  
"So," said Molly with a sickening smile. "Back again, are you?" Lily glared at her for a moment and then straightened up.  
  
"As a matter of fact, Molly, he'll be eating here indefinitely. Severus and I are going steady."  
  
Severus tensed and cast a panicked look at Lily as the entire table went silent. Molly seemed just as shocked as he was.  
  
"Oh...really?" she choked. Lily whipped her napkin out with a flourish and laid it across her lap.  
  
"Yes, really. So you better learn to be nicer to him," she replied and began daintily cutting her pork chop.  
  
Soon the chattering and laughing had built back up again, though now it was mixed with low whispering and fleeting glances toward the couple. Severus ate quietly and tried to pretend the morning had never happened.  
  
¥  
  
Sirius limped his way down to Filch's office that night. His leg was fully healed but it still ached when he put his full weight on it. As he dragged down the dark corridor, he suddenly heard the sound of glass shattering and a short scream.  
  
Oh no, not again, he thought as he quickened his pace towards the source of the sound. He rounded the next corner to find Filch running towards him, chasing a small, neon pink mass of fur. The yowling animal dashed between Sirius's legs and disappeared down the hall.  
  
"Mrs. Norris! Come back!" Filch cooed, tripping over his own feet and coming to a halt. He looked up to see Sirius grinning, and his face twisted into a snarl.  
  
"T'was you, wasn't it! You turned my poor Mrs. Norris pink!" he panted, straightening up.  
  
Sirius immediately relaxed his face. "Why, no sir. I'm just reporting for detention."  
  
At that moment, Sirius saw Snape dash around the corner that Filch had come from. Upon seeing Filch and Sirius, he slowed noticeably. I would too.  
  
"A likely story! Same as that ruffian!" Filch hissed, jabbing a finger back at the slowly approaching Snape. Sirius couldn't suppress his smile any longer, and Filch glared at him menacingly.  
  
"Think it's funny, do yeh? Well let's see how funny you think it is after you've found her! The both of yeh! Don't yeh come back 'till you've got my Mrs. Norris!" And with that, the grimy man turned and stalked back down the hall.  
  
Sirius sniggered and turned to see that Snape was glaring at him. For just a moment, his eyes caught again on the way a fringe of dark hair curled under the angular jaw, but he shook it off as images of the infirmary popped into his head. He felt instantly angry.  
  
"What?" he snapped. "It's better than writing lines, isn't it?" He pointed after where the pink cat had vanished. "Come on. We best should go after her. Flea-bitten old nag..."  
  
They set off down the dark hallway. "Mrs. Norris..." Sirius clucked. "Come on out, Mrs. Norris, you nasty little bugger..." The torches lighting the way became fewer and further between, and soon Sirius was struggling to see ten feet in front of him.  
  
"Lumos!" he heard behind him and the limestone walls lit up with a dim glow. Ah yes, sometimes I forget I'm a wizard, he thought, drawing out his own wand and whispering the incantation. White light splashed against the ornately carved moldings lining the ceiling and Sirius realized that he didn't recognize this particular corridor. He walked to an alcove containing a statue of what looked to be Rowena Ravenclaw. Maybe the little git is back there, he thought.  
  
"Here, kitty kitty..." he cooed. "Meow..." He knelt down and crawled into the shadowy alcove, scurrying all the way around and coming out on the statue's other side. Getting to his feet, he saw that Snape was standing in the middle of the hall, watching him with a sneer.  
  
"Aren't you going to help?" he asked irritably.  
  
Snape just crossed his arms and glared daggers. Sirius began to feel anger boiling in his gut.  
  
"What, giving me the silent treatment again? I thought I did us a favor," he snapped.  
  
Snape's glare finally broke into incredulity. "There's no point in it anyway. An you've just gotten us hopelessly lost."  
  
"I didn't-" Sirius let out a long sigh. "Ok, look. You're obviously pissed at me, and I'm definitely not happy with you. Why don't you go that way," he pointed angrily down the hall, "and I'll go this way," he said, pointing in the opposite direction. "We'll meet back here in thirty minutes."  
  
Snape suddenly looked stricken, but gulped and straightened up. "Fine," he replied and spun on his heel.  
  
Sirius turned as well and began striding purposefully down the hall. His heels clacked noisily and the sound ricocheted against the cold walls. Chilly air blew up into the sleeves of his robes and he was struck by how very cool it was. He slowed and looked behind him to see that the light from Snape's wand had disappeared around a corner. Good riddance, he thought tetchily. There was a steady dripping sound coming from further down the hall, where the last bits of light graduated into complete darkness. He pointed his wand at the void in front of him, but the blackness just seemed to swallow the beam.  
  
That's odd, he thought, glancing back towards the lighter end of the hall, but he walked a bit further. Suddenly, he felt something cold clamp down on his arm.  
  
"Arrgh!" he shrieked and spun around. Snape pulled back his hand and looked startled.  
  
"My wand went out," the boy said, shivering. "Frightened, were you?"  
  
Sirius took quick gasping breaths. "Oh- you didn't- frighten me... Just- gave me a- bloody heart attack!"  
  
"Where's that legendary Gryffindor courage?" Snape sneered but then quietly added, looking at his shoes, "We could use some right now."  
  
Sirius threw him a dirty look but something caught his eye. Deep into the black void ahead of them, there was a sliver of light.  
  
"Hey look. What's that?" he wondered aloud, walking towards the glow. He heard footsteps behind him trying to catch up. The strange darkness around him was almost stuffy; it felt like it was literally pressing on his skin, and he walked toward the light as if he were trying to reach the surface of water.  
  
Severus followed closely behind Black, all too aware of the stifling darkness, until they reached the crack of light where Black languidly pushed open the door. It creaked ominously as it swung, giving them a view of a room beyond. The air was thick with dust and spider webs hung lazily from the heavy rafters.  
  
"What is this place?" Severus asked shakily.  
  
"Oh, you've decided to speak to me, then? I was beginning to wonder if someone had cleverly replaced you with a stump," Black replied heatedly and sneezed, forcing a cloud of dust to puff around his head.  
  
Severus's eyes were burning almost as much as his temper, but he managed to look at their surroundings. They were in a dimly lit room packed full of boxes and angular forms that were covered in dusty sheets. The ceiling was relatively low. There was only one torch placed against the far wall, and it shone through the sheets, casting eerie silhouettes of what they concealed. As the hall had been cool and damp, this place was strangely warm, almost uncomfortably so.  
  
"Well," Black said, walking out into the room, "this is odd."  
  
Snape rolled his eyes. "Oh yes, a storage room is most definitely odd."  
  
"I meant the way it's warm, you git."  
  
"Oh, you managed to notice that then? At least now I know you're not brain- dead."  
  
"All right!" Black yelled, whirling to face him. "That's it! I can't take it anymore! What is wrong with you?"  
  
Severus was momentarily stunned, but then put on his best smirk. "I haven't the foggiest idea what you're talking about."  
  
"You've been scowling at me all evening! What's eating you?"  
  
Severus felt a bit of his patience drain away. "None of your business."  
  
Black stalked towards him, his teeth bared. "Don't you give me that. I know something's bothering you. What, you getting tired of me saving your worthless hide, you wimp?"  
  
Something in Severus snapped. He threw his clenched fist at Black only to have it caught in midair. Black clucked his tongue.  
  
"That move is getting a bit predictable, Snivelly," he sneered, shoving the fist down. At that moment, Severus felt the last voice of reason leave him as he lunged for the other boy, tackling him before either of them could register what was happening. They slammed into a sheet-covered pile, flailing violently.  
  
"You bloody bastard, I'll kill you!" Severus snarled, trying with all his might to inflict some sort of pain on the soft body underneath him but succeeding in only clawing at it helplessly. His fists became more and more entangled in the mass of robes.  
  
"Get off me, you monkey!" Black yelped, thrashing wildly. "Have you lost your mind? Let me go, or I'll-" He suddenly stopped moving. "Mrs. Norris!"  
  
Severus paused in his mauling. "What?"  
  
Black squirmed and pointed off between the boxes. "There! I saw her! Get off me so we can grab her and get out of here."  
  
Severus started to pull away but hesitated. "This had better not be a trick, Black."  
  
Black growled in frustration. "Snape, I swear to you...How 'bout if I'm lying, you can beat me senseless?"  
  
I just know this is a trick, Sirius thought, raising up off of Black and straightening his robes.  
  
"Well, where is she?" he sneered.  
  
"Just hold on a second," Black snapped and walked between the piles. Severus sighed and crossed his arms. I don't know what's wrong with me. I need to relax. A few minutes later, Severus realized that he couldn't see or hear the other boy. I knew it. I should have gone with him.  
  
"Black?" he said cautiously. No answer.  
  
"Black, this isn't funny," he whispered. He felt the dim light fading as time passed and the dark closing in on him from all sides. The hand clutching his wand began to shake uncontrollably. He glanced down at his the trembling fingers to see...red.  
  
"Black," he croaked, backing up involuntarily. "Black!" he managed to shout. He felt something solid touch his back and he spun to face it with a gasp. It was just a stack of boxes. He crouched down next to it and clasped his hands over his head, whimpering.  
  
"Black," he sobbed. "Help..."  
  
Suddenly there were feet in front of him. "Snape? Snape, what's wrong?" Warm hands lay on his shoulders. "Snape!" Black was shaking him gently but urgently. Black. He was Severus and he was with Black. Reality came rushing back to him.  
  
"Oh gods," he hiccoughed. "Don't leave me alone again." He grasped Black at the elbows. The boy looked genuinely alarmed.  
  
"Dear Merlin, you're pale! I mean, more than usual. What happened?" Black asked, pulling the slimmer boy to his feet. Even though the room was stiflingly warm, Severus's veins still ran cold.  
  
"Why didn't you answer me?" he asked accusingly.  
  
"Were you calling? I came back to find you cowering next to the boxes here," Sirius said his eyes wide with fear. Suddenly his face grew stern. "Snape, tell me what happened, now."  
  
The note off the command told Severus that Black was determined to hear an answer. He sighed and batted Black's hands away dismissively.  
  
"Nothing. I'm just...I'm just a bit afraid of-"  
  
"The dark?" Black supplied. Severus scowled at him.  
  
"Why Snape... That's positively human of you," Black said sardonically.  
  
That was a mistake. "I knew I shouldn't have told you."  
  
"No...Snape, I'm sorry. I wasn't making fun of you. I'm sort of afraid of the dark too," Black supplied. "Here, come with me. I found something really weird." Severus followed with a hand firmly grasping Black's elbow. The other boy didn't seem to mind.  
  
Sirius glanced back at Snape thoughtfully. What in Merlin's name just happened? One moment he was trying to find his way back to where he'd left Snape, and the next, he'd found him cowering in a corner.  
  
While he had gone to find Mrs. Norris, the most curious thing had happened. He had sprinted to the far side of the big room, following the flash of bright pink, when he suddenly came upon a tall mirror. He approached it to see Mrs. Norris eyeing him cheekily from the reflection, but when he turned to look at the space next to him, where the cat should have been, there was just empty space. Perplexed, he looked back in the mirror, and there in the reflection was indeed Mrs. Norris, sitting on the floor directly to his right.  
  
Now, there were a great many frightening things that Sirius could handle alone, but a reflection that was different from reality, though he wished it were reality, was a bit too much. He had immediately headed back to Snape.  
  
"I guess I was right, huh? I mean, about why you're angry," he said quietly as he led Snape around what was obviously a statue draped in sheets. He looked back to see that Snape was avoiding his eyes.  
  
"I thought so," Sirius nodded in understanding and shoved his hands into his pockets, looking ahead once again. "Hey, I know the feeling," he said. He shrugged when he saw the skeptical expression on Snape's face. "No really...my family... well, it's not a big secret that I hate them. Everyone says I'm 'just being a teenager', but I don't know. I get this feeling sometimes that there's something really wrong with them. But there's nothing I can do! Can't go anywhere, can't do anything. I'm stuck with them... dependent on them. You know?" He glanced back again.  
  
Snape didn't say anything at this little speech, but subtly fanned his shining face with his free hand. At least he's not giving me looks that kill anymore. Sirius idly worried the rubber band on his wrist.  
  
"It was because of a combination of things," came a quiet voice.  
  
Sirius stopped and turned to his companion. "What?"  
  
"You asked why I'm...in a mood. It's a combination of factors," Snape said quietly. "I suppose I'm just...having a difficult day."  
  
Sirius leaned back against a sheet-covered desk. "What made it difficult?" Snape smirked and shook his head.  
  
"Black, even you can't be that dense. I came very close to being killed today," he sneered. "Isn't that enough to be irritable about?"  
  
"Irritable...that's a strange way to react to a near death experience."  
  
Snape huffed in frustration. "Black...never mind. Forget I said anything." He turned and began to walk off and Sirius stood gritting his teeth. Maybe he was just a stupid teenager. The way he kept snapping at Snape, he had no right to accuse the boy of being moody. It feels like we keep taking one step forward and two steps back, he thought grimly before trotting up next to Snape and touching his elbow.  
  
"Wait. Um, are you hot?" he asked but cringed inwardly. Wow, I don't think I've ever said anything so stupid. The look on Snape's face said that he was thinking the same thing.  
  
"Here." Sirius pulled the rubber band off his wrist and shoved it unceremoniously into Snape's hand. "You can pull your hair off your neck. Must be awfully uncomfortable."  
  
For a moment, he thought Snape was going to take another swing at him. Sirius looked into the other boy's face as earnestly as he could.  
  
"Look, I know they're there," he said, and Snape stiffened. "It doesn't make any difference now. If you're hot, pull your hair back." He turned and kept walking, and a moment later, he smiled to see that Snape was striding beside him with his hair tied into a ratty ponytail.  
  
"Ah! Here it is."  
  
The enormous mirror stood before them. Sirius peered into the murky depths of the reflection, only to find that Mrs. Norris was nowhere to be found. Well, so much for proving I was telling the truth. He took a moment to observe the object on front of him. The mirror was freestanding on clawed feet and its frame was ornately carved, patterns and runes dug deep into the wood. It was considerably taller than Sirius was; he guessed it to be about seven feet tall at the least. The glass wasn't clear like the mirrors in the lavatories, but had a strange haze over it, as if he were looking into a light fog.  
  
"Isn't this the strangest-" he began but stopped. Snape was walking towards the mirror, one hand outstretched and the other placed on his nose. It would have almost been funny if it weren't for the look of sheer despondence on Snape's face.  
  
"Snape? What are you doing?" he asked anxiously. Snape's hand met up with the glass and he traced his fingers tentatively along the reflection of his nose.  
  
"My nose," the boy whispered. "It's...different."  
  
Sirius grasped Snape's shoulder and looked into his face. "No it's not. It just the same as always." Snape frowned down at him.  
  
"I know that, you twit...look at the reflection."  
  
Sirius quickly turned back to the mirror and peered at it closely. Snape's nose looked the same as ever, but other things were different. He wasn't slouched over, like Sirius had seen him so many times before, but was standing tall and confident. And his face wasn't contorted into its usual scowl, but was rather relaxed and pleasant-looking.  
  
As he watched, Mirror-Snape grinned and waved and casually draped an arm across the shoulders of Sirius's own reflection.  
  
"Snape, what are you..." he began, turning to the other boy. Snape wasn't touching him at all, but was gazing at the mirror with such a strong expression of longing that Sirius was taken aback. A thought suddenly struck him.  
  
"Snape, what do you see? I don't think it's the same as what I'm seeing."  
  
Snape mouthed wordlessly for a moment before shaking his head. "I...nothing. I just look different."  
  
Sirius frowned and looked back to the mirror just in time to see Mirror- Snape lean over and begin playfully nibbling Mirror-Sirius's throat.  
  
"Holy Mackerel!" Sirius yelped and leapt back from the frame. Snape gave him a curious look before glancing back to the mirror and gasping.  
  
"Merlin!" he exclaimed and looked to the real Sirius, wide eyed. Sirius crept back up to the mirror and stared dumbfounded at the reflection. Now Mirror-Sirius was reaching a hand around and gently petting Mirror-Snape's face.  
  
"Snape...you don't see anything...odd, do you?" he asked shakily. Snape gaped at the mirror and shook his head rapidly.  
  
"Good. Me neither. Shall we tell Filch we couldn't find her, then? Right. Let's be off," he said without waiting for an answer. He whirled around and trotted back towards the entrance with Snape following at his heels. They practically ran through the doorway and back up the corridor, never stopping to look back.  
  
¥  
  
Once they were back in the fresh, cool air of the upper levels of the castle, Sirius's mind began to clear. Oh gods, what was that? Did Snape see the same thing that I did? If not, what did he see? They were still walking briskly towards the Gryffindor common when Sirius heard familiar voices coming from around the corner. He grabbed Snape's elbow and pulled him behind a nearby column. Snape tried to yank his arm away but Sirius tightened his grip.  
  
"Shhh," he whispered, pointing down the hall. Slowly the distant voices came closer and became discernable.  
  
"Lucius, are you sure about this? I mean, you really think she'll like me if I join the club?"  
  
"Of course she will. I told you, Avery, she likes bad boys. Besides, she's in the club herself. It's the perfect way to prove it to Bella that you're serious about her. Trust he mean my cousin Bella? thought Sirius with surprise. He knew his cousin, a seventh year, was into dating the tough type, but why would she be consorting with Malfoy? The footsteps were almost upon them now, and Sirius began to inch around the column with Snape following at his side.  
  
"Really, Lucius? You think so?" Avery said hopefully.  
  
"There's only one way to find out, you know. But shut up! McGonagall will hear us!" Malfoy hissed. Sirius and Snape slid all the way around to the other side of the column as the two other boys passed within feet them, continuing down the hall. Sirius leaned over and peaked down the hall to see Malfoy's platinum tresses flutter as he and Avery disappeared around a corner.  
  
"Black..." came a voice next to Sirius and he jumped.  
  
"You know you have a real knack for scaring me out of my wits?" he gasped. Snape looked at him impatiently.  
  
"Sorry. It's just that I think I ought to tell you something," Snape said quietly.  
  
Sirius felt his stomach flutter. Oh gods. He did see what I saw in the mirror. Maybe I can pretend I didn't see it. His skin felt burning-hot against the cool stone of the column that they were leaning against. He suddenly realized that his hand was still firmly attached to Snape's right arm. It was quite bizarre that casually touching the other boy was so natural that he didn't even notice that he was doing it. He could feel the warmth of skin beneath Snape's shirt, but for some reason, couldn't pull his hand away.  
  
"Yes?" he said and his voice cracked. Oh, that was real smooth. Get a hold of yourself, man!  
  
Snape gently pulled his arm out of Sirius's grip and drew up his sleeve to reveal a row of untidy red lines raked across his forearm.  
  
"I arrived at Filch's office early, and the door was open. That...blasted cat must have been sitting on top of the door, because when I tried to go in, she fell onto my head. I--" he cleared his throat, "Well, I lost my temper."  
  
Comprehension dawned on Sirius's face. "Snape!" he gasped with an open- mouthed grin. "It was you!"  
  
"Be quiet!" Snape hissed and twisted to check up and down the hall, but when he turned back, his dark eyes were glittering deviously. Sirius couldn't contain his excitement.  
  
"Pink! I don't believe it! How did you do it? What spell did you use? And hey! You bastard! Filch thought it was me," he said, feigning anger.  
  
"It was a stupid thing to do," Snape said, raking falling strands of hair out of his face. "I could have been caught." He turned and began walking down the hall towards the common room. Sirius practically skipped next to him, smiling in amazement.  
  
"That was brilliant, Snape! I don't think I would even have the guts to mess with Mrs. Norris," Sirius said exuberantly.  
  
"It wasn't really that impressive, Black. Besides, it will have worn off by now," Snape said dismissively as they reached the portrait of the fat lady who eyed them with a sly smile.  
  
"Crackers...Well," whispered Sirius as they stepped through the portrait hole, "I thought it was impressive." He put a finger to his lips as they stepped into the common room. Ever since Remus had caught them the day before, Sirius had been feeling particularly paranoid about being seen. He stealthily looked around the room before waving Snape out of the shadows and tiptoeing towards the staircase. He had climbed most of the way up to the attic when he felt Snape tapping him on the shoulder.  
  
"You don't need to walk me up," Snape whispered breathily. Sirius felt heat prickling his ears in embarrassment and without saying a word he made his way back down to his dorm room. When he reached his own four-poster he flopped down on it.  
  
What a perfectly exhausting day, he thought wearily as he peeled of his shirt and trousers. I feel like I could doze off just like this. He flipped onto his side and curled his knees up to his chest, pulling the cool blanket around his shoulders. He raised his eyebrows contentedly and let out a long sigh.  
  
What did Snape see in the mirror? The question came to him almost as if someone had whispered it in his ear. He huffed in frustration and rolled onto his back, staring at the canopy. Snape looked just as shocked as me when I saw the mirror. And he said that his nose was different in the reflection, but it looked just the same to me. He must have seen something different than me all together... but what?  
  
Closing his eyes tightly, he willed himself to go to sleep. The image of Snape nibbling his neck drifted through his mind. He sat straight up. This is ridiculous. I'll just go ask him. Then at least I'll have some peace.  
  
He grudgingly lifted himself off the mattress and pushed the covers down. The chilly air hit his bare skin as he started for the door and he remembered with a snort of laughter that he was wearing only his shorts. He turned back and walked over to James's wardrobe, pulling out the invisibility cloak. Just in case, he thought as he slung it over his shoulders. He walked soundlessly through the entrance and up the stairs to the attic door.  
  
"Silencio!" he hissed and pushed the door open.  
  
¥  
  
Severus couldn't sleep. He had been exhausted when he reached his makeshift room and had lain down on the bed without even taking his clothes off, but even though his body was fatigued, it felt like his mind didn't want any part of the respite. It raced around over the events of the day, one image after another making him cringe. Finally he sat up in irritation. Glancing over at the door, he noticed that it was ajar. That's strange. I thought I closed it, he thought as he got up and pushed the door shut. The back of his neck prickled as he was once again in complete darkness and he reached a hand out into it.  
  
"Accio wand!" he hissed and he felt his wand suddenly resting in his palm. Shaking a bit from the blackness pressing around his eyes, he froze. Just for a moment he thought he had heard something...something like breathing. He hastily waved his wand over his head.  
  
"Lumen Skopein!" he muttered, and the room was instantly dancing with dim, blue light. Glowing cyan tendrils laced their way out of his wand, traveling around the walls like living Christmas lights and meeting at the far side of the room. They cast little facetted diamonds of light onto the floor and ceiling, reflecting upon Severus's dark clothes as he lifted his arms out to it. Mother.  
  
The light reminded him of her. It was one of the few things about her he could remember. He knew the spell was Dark, but then she had been Dark, in a Light sort of way. The Darkness had coursed through his mother like a necessary evil. Every summer must have a winter, he thought grimly. She had taught him the spell when he was about nine years old when she had found him in his room, cowering under the covers.  
  
She sat down on the edge of the bed. "Severus, what's wrong?" she asked soothingly.  
  
"I'm scared," he whimpered, pulling the sheets down to see her. "Father said that a werewolf would get me if I didn't mind him." He lay there, taking in the beautiful sight of his mother. Her auburn hair shone in the candlelight and her pale cheeks were rosy as she smiled at him and gathered him into her slender arms.  
  
"Would you like me to show you something that will keep the werewolves away?" she had whispered into his hair. He nodded and snuffled as she pulled away and stood in the middle of his room. She was wearing an emerald green nightdress that hugged her slim figure.  
  
She sang the incantation and with a flick of her wand, the blue kaleidoscope of light wove its way around his large bedroom. He lay back in wonder as the tendrils twinkled above him and his mother laughed affectionately. She sounded like bells...  
  
Severus snapped out of his reverie and let his arms fall back down to his sides. Striding over to his trunk, he carefully pulled the lid up and extracted the black journal from its secret pocket as he did almost every night. Returning to the bed, he set the book onto his pillow. The pajamas were folded neatly on the edge of the bed where he had left them that morning, and he began to unbutton his vest.  
  
¥  
  
In the dim light, Sirius could make out Snape's figure lying on the bed, still wearing all his clothes. I'll just tap him, he thought as he padded closer to the bed. Suddenly, he saw movement. Snape swung his legs over the side of the bed and walked right towards him.  
  
Sirius sucked in a breath and leapt to the side just as Snape unknowingly strode right past him. Turning, he saw that Snape was closing the door, and then they were in complete darkness.  
  
Where is he?! he realized. He held as still as he could. Snape didn't make a sound, and Sirius was instantly aware that he was panting under the silky cloak. Can he hear me? He held his breath.  
  
"Accio wand!" rang out Snape's voice and Sirius jumped. He knows I'm here! He began inching his way back away from door, his stomach flip-flopping, when he heard another incantation.  
  
"Lumen Skopein!"  
  
Very slowly, an eerie blue light erupted from a point in the darkness, and shimmering trails of the illumination weeded around the perimeter of the room. It gradually lit up Snape's face and made his dark eyes glitter.  
  
Thank Merlin! At least I can see, Sirius thought with relief. For a moment, he had the sinking feeling that maybe this strange light was a way to see through invisibility cloaks, but the other boy merely held his palms out to the glow, ignoring Sirius completely. Well, I guess it's too late to announce my arrival.  
  
Snape let his arms fall and walked over to the trunk, and Sirius backed up against the wall. Snape was close enough that if he had taken a step or two in Sirius's direction, they would easily collide. What's he doing? The boy let the lid close and turned to reveal that he was holding the journal, then gently set it on his bed. That's when Snape started taking off his clothes.  
  
Sirius's eyes flew open. Oh gods! I've got to get out of here! He threw a desperate glance towards the door, but he couldn't open it without being seen. Snape pulled his vest off of his shoulders and Sirius squeezed his eyes shut. I'm a Gryffindor, I'm a Gryffindor, he chanted. Gryffindors don't spy. Gryffindors don't watch people undress. They certainly don't watch Snape undress! He lifted one eyelid cautiously. Snape's shirt was untucked and he was obviously unbuttoning it. Sirius pressed his palms against the wall, breathing a quietly as he could, though he felt like taking great gulps of air. Snape grasped his collar and pulled the shirt off over his head. No!!! he thought as he clenched his eyes shut.  
  
His heart racing, Sirius cracked an eye open again. Snape's back stretched languidly...almost cat-like. His back is lighter than his face and hands, Sirius remarked to himself, a bit hysterically. I didn't know it was possible to be that pale...like milk. The scrawny boy's ribs were clear along his sides as he took a deep breath and stretched again. Thin arms swung gracefully at his sides, accentuating the angular hips.  
  
He's almost...pretty, Sirius thought and then quickly added, in an aesthetic sort of way. With the blue light and everything... He mentally slapped himself. Aesthetic or not, you're watching Snape! A guy! What's wrong with you? Sirius could hear only his own heartbeat in his ears and the rustle of Snape's clothes.  
  
Snape reached a hand up to the back of his head and gently pulled the rubber band, causing the dark, lank hair to spill down over his bare shoulders. Sirius stared, open-mouthed. He's like some sort of painting. Black on white... Snape began tugging at the waistband of his trousers, and Sirius turned and faced the wall. That's a bit too much. He focused on the stone wall in front of him. I was only looking because I was curious. Anyone would be. Even James would be.  
  
He turned back when he heard the sheets rustle softly and saw that Snape was sitting on the bed and opening the journal. Why would anyone want to look at those depressing entries? Snape pulled his wand out of the pile of clothes at the end of the bed and jabbed the open journal with it.  
  
"Severus Snape, master of this school, commands you to yield the information you conceal!" the boy said with grandeur. Sirius choked on a laugh, and Snape suddenly jerked his head up from his journal and looked right where Sirius was standing.  
  
"Who's there?" Sirius froze. Snape unfolded his legs and put a foot out onto the floor, grabbing his wand in the process. "Hello?"  
  
Sirius didn't even breathe, thought his heart was racing a mile a minute. The other boy peaked around the bed hangings with a look of suspicion. Sirius edged towards the door in case he needed to make a getaway. Snape surveyed the room once again before backing up onto the bed and pulling the curtains closed.  
  
Sirius clutched at his chest, taking deep, silent breaths. He didn't know whether to feel relieved or disappointed. If Snape hadn't heard him, he could be looking at the contents of those pages at this very moment. Instead, he stood shaking, gazing at the impenetrable curtains. Moving so slowly that it was almost painful, he grasped the doorknob and prayed that the silencing charm was still functioning as he gave it a twist. The door swung open soundlessly and he glided past it, pulling it shut behind him. The light from a torch burning further down the staircase shone dimly against the wall and he realized that the light was orange compared to the striking blue of the room he had just left.  
  
Why am I thinking about the stupid light? I just watched Snape take his clothes off! And I didn't even get to ask what he saw in the mirror. He grudgingly walked a few steps down the stairs. I guess I'll just ask him in detention tomorrow. Oh, damn. This was the last detention of the week. He wouldn't see Snape again until next week. He turned on his heel and stepped eagerly back to the attic door. After reaching for the knob, he scolded himself and knocked lightly on the wood. No answer.  
  
He probably thinks it's someone else. He knocked again, just in case Snape hadn't heard him and then tentatively opened the door. The room was black and all traces of the tendrils of light had vanished. He walked towards the bed.  
  
"Snape?" he said. The curtains flew back instantly to reveal a confused Snape.  
  
"Black? What do you wa-...?" Snape paused. "Where are you?"  
  
Drat. Sirius looked down at his invisible body, remembering with a blush that he was wearing only his underwear beneath it.  
  
"Uh...well. I...oh, hell. Here." He pulled the hood back from his face, careful not to reveal his bare shoulders, and Snape gasped.  
  
"That's an invisibility cloak! Where did you get that?" Snape asked, his voice filled with wonder. Sirius felt slightly annoyed, more at his forgetfulness and embarrassment than Snape's questions.  
  
"Never mind that," he snapped. "I need to know how we're going to get you up here tomorrow night. Since we don't have detention, we'll have to meet or something."  
  
Snape's shoulders visibly slumped. "Indeed. Well...how about the library?"  
  
"Too public," Sirius said, biting his lip. "Why don't you just meet me out in front of the fat lady right before curfew?" Snape snorted.  
  
"Oh, and that isn't too public?"  
  
"Do you have any better ideas?"  
  
Snape sighed. "I suppose not. In front of the fat lady it is, then."  
  
"All right," Sirius replied, turning back towards the doorway. "Goodnight, Snape."  
  
"Goodnight, Black."  
  
Sirius turned to leave. "Oh, and Snape?" he whispered with his back turned as he reached the door.  
  
"You're not a...wimp." He shut the door behind him without waiting for a reply, though he knew there wouldn't have been one.

A/N: [EDIT 7-31-04] hey yall. I know... I know I've been missing for 2 months. I have some things to tell you. First of all, yes, I am working on the story. Mostly, I'm revising, reworking, basically ripping it apart. Almost everything will be the same, with a little addition: planning on my part. This plot is just too good to pass up.  
  
In writing this monstrosity, it has come to my attention that I can't just sit down and write until my fingers fall off, with no REAL plot to stick to. I got to about the 6th page of chapter 7, and I suddenly realized that I had NO idea what to write next. The reason? Planning, or lack thereof. I started off with a beginning and an end in mind, but no plans for the in- between. That's what I'm working on right now. This story, though for the most part will remain a romance, is also going to incorporate some political and general aspects. Wish me luck, cause I really suck at that kind of thing...of course, 6 months ago, I thought I couldn't write fiction at all. Heh. It will also focus a bit more on the relationships between the marauders, lily, and surprisingly enough, prof. Mcgonagall (I can't wait to write that).  
  
If I didn't tell you this before, I am trying to make this fit with canon. I'm trying to tell the story of what might have happened before. I want it to be POSSIBLE. So don't be freaked out when Lucius is replaced with another character (spoiler alert). Erm, Molly and Arthur are already long gone in my latest draft. Sorry if yall were attached. It's better. Believe me. Also, if any of you die-hard fans out there can spot anything that doesn't fit with canon, please email me and tell me. I've probably caught it already, but you never know.  
  
Anyways, I am not sure when I'm going to have the next chapter up; it's hard to find the time or inspiration to write when my mother is constantly shooting daggers at me cause I'm such a worthless deadbeat. What I CAN tell you, for sure, is that I will no longer be updating it here. FF does not allow the kind of formatting that I require, so any further updates will be on my website (also cause, heh, it's going to be harder than R). Any notices about how the writing is going and such will be on my LJ, which can be accessed through my website: "askandrea . com / soliloquy" (remove the spaces). Heh, look at the fiction page for a commentary on my writing skills by Mr. Severus A. Snape himself. And look at my art page for illustrations of the boys and company.  
  
(wrings 's proverbial neck) god, how I wish I could reply to your comments on the reply board. Grrr...so here are replies to the biggest questions (if I didn't already answer above):  
  
Ashii Black: S & S could be gay. Who knows? In fact, there has been a lot of evidence that they WERE gay. AU....ugh. As for James, maybe he just didn't realize that he was crazy about Lil; sort the same thing that's going on between S & S. He just hasn't figured out yet that he hates her cause he's been in love with her. As for lily being marysue: as Fabula Rasa said to me when I was sobbing over this comment (jk), it's difficult to write a Lily who ISN'T marysue, as her character in the books is so underdeveloped. So yeah, she based a lot on me cause I'm the girl I know the best. But truthfully, if you want to find a marysue in my fic, look at Sirius. If I was male, I'd BE Sirius. Seriously (snerk). Oh, and I'm so glad that someone liked my filch too. God, he is so much fun to write, even if I'm the only one who thinks it's funny. And I'll give you a big nasty clue to the ending: this story WILL be completely canon-possible.  
  
Long Live Sirius Black: please, no rats. My house is already infested with fleas (scritch scritch). Believe me, I am ashamed that I've let the fic sit this long, especially without telling you folks. It will be MUCH better once I'm done working on it. Bear with me.


End file.
